What I Believe

The Goblin Book

2011-10-31T10:37:00.001-04:00

The Goblin Book

by Brad Meltzer

On his deathbed, my grandfather gave me The Goblin Book.

“It’ll work for you,” he whispered. “It will.”

Don’t worry. I was confused too. I didn’t like creepy old grandfathers who talked in riddles. It was annoying.

But he explained how it worked. How a reader  usually the smart ones  would be holding a book, lost in a story. And then, the book would feel odd in the reader’s hands.

The book would feel heavy, then lighter, then heavy again.

And then the reader would have the oddest feeling of all: that inescapable feeling that someone was watching them.

It was true, of course. That was the gift of The Goblin Book. With it, I could find any reader…and watch them through their book.

The best part?

I can see you right now.

I can.

No, you think to yourself.

But I can. And I’ll see you again tonight.

Fighting the Lightning: A Eulogy for Stewart Meltzer

2011-03-14T22:13:00.002-04:00

My father was struck by lighting. And so was his father, my grandfather.

That’s not a metaphor. They were both actually struck by a flaming bolt of lightning from the sky.

And though this is my father’s funeral, to fully paint him, I need to start with my grandfather.

My father’s father was the kind of dad who…let me just say it…he wasn’t a good father. My grandfather was a well known boxer in the military, and the sad truth is, he put those fists on my Dad. I don’t tell you that to elicit sympathy or make you feel bad. I tell you because it explains the core of my father⎯and what my father wanted to be: He simply wanted to not be like his own father.

It wasn’t easy for my Dad. When it comes to bad habits, we’re so often taught them.

And that’s how life is, right? As adults, we all know right from wrong, but no matter how hard we try, what we see as children colors how we see the world for the rest of our lives. We can try to escape, but fate has a way of making us like our own parents, whether we like it or not.

And so, back to the lightning.

When my grandfather was in the army, he was struck by a bolt of lighting. The resulting burns⎯and whatever mental damage came with them⎯led to his eventual discharge from the military.

A generation later, my Dad (as a boy) was at sleepaway camp, bouncing on his bed at Camp Na-Sho-Pa when another lightning bolt came from the sky⎯I swear, this is what was told to us⎯and hit my father, who sank to the floor. They thought he was dead. They even put a sheet over his head. He was dead! And then, in his first (but not last) moment of death-defiance, Stewie Meltzer sat up and blurted, What’s everyone looking at?

Two lightning bolts. Two men. Father and son. If I wrote this crap myself, my editor would tell me no one would believe it.

But there it was: my father’s destiny. One lighting bolt hits. Then another follows.

To be clear, for much of his life, my Dad doesn’t do much to step off the path.

When he was born, it was because my grandmother fell⎯and it was the fall that sent her into labor. When my Dad was little, his grades were bad, but when his teachers picked out the occupation he was suited for, they said he should be a mayor.

As a teenager, he was exactly what he was till his last days: a loud-mouthed, sports-obsessed super-fan, who only took his eye off the ball to look at a passing pretty girl. His number one sidekick was his cousin Harvey. Harvey was the pitcher. My dad was the catcher. And let me say, my father was an superb athlete. He wasn’t good. He was fantastic. A star, who almost played minor league ball, except for those bad knees.

During summers, my Dad and his cousin would travel camp to camp…challenging and trying to take on whole teams. The camps would look at these two guys and say, “Sure. We’ll take that bet.” And then Harvey would throw his smoke, striking out everyone⎯and him and my Dad would walk away with the day’s money in their pockets. And if there was a bad call…or an argument that they were being suckered? That’s when Stewie’s temper would erupt. Could my father and his cousin fight an entire baseball team? They tried. A lot.

Now, I know there are many people in this room who think they’ve seen my Dad’s temper. You are wrong. You’ve see Stewie mad when he was in his forties, fifties, or even sixties. That was nothing compared to the hurricane force that was my father’s temper when he was in his twenties. And again, he learned it right from his own father. My Dad rooted for the Brooklyn Dodgers; my grandfather rooted for the Yankees. There was the perfect metaphor. Opposite teams; bitter, hateful rivalry; and both from the exact same home.

Burning with that anger, my father took the abuse from my grandfather. And he took extra hits when he was trying to protect his younger brother, my Uncle Jeff. It was that burning anger that my Dad brought everywhere. One summer at the bungalow colony, in a burst of it, I remember him being so mad, he flipped over a pool table. A pool table. It took four of us to lift one of those.

And when I was growing up in Brooklyn, nearly every door in our apartment had a huge, deep dent right at the center of it: from where my Dad, in whatever fight he was having, punched a hole in it. His bedroom…every bathroom…they all had a hole. But y’know what room was never touched?

My room. It was the room I shared with my sister. He would never lay a hand on my mother or any of us. And he never punched a hole in our door.

So here’s where the lightning story takes it’s turn. My father may’ve never been one for introspection, but when I was born, he recognized the choice in front of him. Indeed, until that moment, as much as he didn’t want to be like his own father, my Dad was on my grandfather’s path: My grandfather was a salesman in the garment industry, working with schmatas; my father was a salesman and buyer in the garment industry, working with schmatas. My grandfather was a natural charmer, able to sell air to a fish; my father was a charmer, able to sell air to a fish. Two lightning bolts; one following right after the other.

But when I arrived, my father made his decision. For all his faults and bluster and repetition of his father’s faults and bluster, my Dad was more determined than anything in this entire world to be the most loving father on this planet. And that is where my father beats every single person in this room.

My first memory of my father is him coming home from work when I was little. He’d pick me up and put me on the top of the refrigerator, my little feet dangling over the freezer door. And in that moment, I realize he had the two things he loved most in life together in the exact same space: his family and food.

As I got older, when I started writing and I asked my first editor, “How do books sell?” he told me that books are very different than movies. With movies, if you like the preview and the big star, you go see the movie. But with books, it’s usually because someone says to you, “You gotta read this book.” So he said to me, if you want your novel to sell, one of two things has to be true: either you know lots of people. Or you know a couple people with really big mouths.

Now let’s really talk about my father.

He was a big guy⎯big presence⎯big voice. As a dear friend said, you knew when he entered the room, any room, whether it was nearby or not. People just took to him. They were pulled to him like gravity.

And with that voice. Howyadoin? What’sitmakeadifference? His first impression was that of a mobster. And for those who hated him, I’m sorry to break it to you, but he hated you too. He was a giant ball of chaos and emotion, and it never mixed well with those who demanded too much order in their lives. But at the center of that chaos was always one thing: a blind, animalistic devotion. No one was as devoted and as protective as my Dad.

When I was nine or ten, back in Brooklyn, I remember when a group of older boys pretended they were my friends and said, “C’mon, come hang with us.” These were the cooler kids, so I was excited. But the moment they had me alone in the little jungle of trees behind our old apartment building, they took handfuls of prickly itchy plants and rubbed them in my hair, where they knotted and were unable to be taken out without cutting. I ran back to my apartment, hysterically crying. But it was father who found me. I remember his rage as he asked, “Where are those boys now?” I remember following right behind him as he plowed downstairs, raced up to them and literally grabbed the main bully by the neck and lifted him physically off the ground. The threat was a real one: “You go near my boy again and I. Will. Kill. You!” I remember being thrilled my father was doing it, even though I was just as terrified that he was really going to kill this boy. That’s not an exaggeration.

My favorite thing is that, in the past few days, a dear friend reminded me of when we were sitting at a Marlins game a few years ago and I saw a group of boys starting to bully Jonas and Matthew and Nicholas. He reminded me that I exploded, threatening to beat up these little bastards who were messing with my boys. As my friend said, “That's not a Teri influence, or a Flam influence, or an NMB influence. That was pure Brooklyn Stewie.” I’m proud to carry that ruthless protective spirit in me. It is what makes me who I am to this very day. And I thank you, Dad, for showing me how hard a man should love his family.

As time went on, that protectiveness found new outlets. When I got into Michigan and he knew he couldn’t afford it, he said to me, “You’re gonna go there,” determined to never let me down.

When my first book came out, it was my father who was the one who took it from the bottom shelf in the store (where it was filed alphabetically) and put it right at the top, where he thought it belonged (fuck alphabetically).

It was my father who’d go into the local Barnes & Noble and say, in that raspy ridiculous voice, “Yes, I’m wondering if you have the new Brad Meltzer book? He’s my favorite author in the world!” And the clerk would say, “Mr. Meltzer…we know he’s your son. We know.”

And I remember when my second book came out and my father was going in for hip replacement surgery. To be clear, he was terrified of this surgery because when he was eighteen years old and had knee surgery, he died on the table. He flatlined. And they brought him back to life. So now, he knows he doesn’t have the body of an eighteen year old, so he’s terrified that he’s going to die on the table. These are his last moments on earth! And his blood pressure is raging so hard, they have to give him tranquilizers just to calm him down before he can even get the anesthetic. So they calm him down; they take him upstairs. And he’s up there for an hour…an hour and a half… I’m saying, “Please, God, let him be okay.” And after two hours, they finally bring him down, and the doctor says, “Do you wanna go see him?” Of course I wanna see him. And I go into his room…and he’s totally out of it. He’s filled with tranquilizers and all the anesthetic…and he opens his eyes…he has no idea where he is, and⎯this is a true story⎯he says, “I love you.” And then he says, “I sold a dozen books up there.”

And I said, “That’s what you’re thinking of when you’re this close to death? That’s what you’re thinking of?” And I asked him, “Did you tell them about the paperbacks?”

When every book came out, we’d make a t-shirt or a hat. But it was my Dad who turned it into a regular part of his wardrobe. He’d be wearing one of my novels on his hat, and a “Brad Meltzer” t-shirt, and still going up to people and say, “Have you heard about the show Brad Meltzer’s Decoded? He’s my favorite author.”

The truth was, I was his only author. He read eight novels in his life: The Tenth Justice…Dead Even…only the ones I wrote. I’m not making that up. Like my sister said, all he cared about was us. And no one sold us better than my Dad.

In fact, a year ago, when he was going in for heart surgery and we were interviewing doctors, we went to this one doctor at Mt. Sinai who said, “When I do your heart surgery, we don’t cut you open. We do a small incision, and it doesn’t hurt, and you’ll be up in a day…” And we know he’s lying to us, but my Dad’s happy to hear it. Then we go into the next doctor’s office, who says, “Oh, your name is Meltzer. You’re Brad. I like your books.” Of course, I thank him. And then he explains, “I do the surgery the old-fashioned way. I crack your chest…I cut you open. It’s painful. It takes weeks to recuperate. And I’ve lost people on the table.”

So as we walk out, and I swear this is true, my father says, We found our guy. The old-fashioned one.

And I say, “Are you insane? Didn’t you hear what he said? They crack your chest…it’s painful…you can die on the table…”

“Yeah,” my father says. “But he buys the books.”

For me, one of the best came just a few months ago, when I brought my Dad to the Decoded filming here in Florida. I introduce him to the producer and cameramen and sound and makeup people. I give him a place to sit. And I tell him that once they say “Action,” he has to do one thing: be quiet. Have you ever asked my Dad to be quiet? Now…it’s a two minute take. Two minutes. That’s it. But as I start speaking, I can feel it. It’s like a black hole has opened on the side of the room and my father is shaking, fighting the urge to blurt something. It’s physically killing him. And then, the instant they yell, “Cut,” my father unleashes, telling the producer something vitally important, like where the best new Chinese restaurant is that he just found on Oakland Park Boulevard. Looking back, it’s the perfect analogy: my father, Stu Meltzer, could never be contained.

Everything else in my father’s life was unplanned. It was chaos. Like when he lost his job and decided to move from Brooklyn to Florida. He was 39 years old, but this was going to be what he called the “do-over” of life⎯he was going to start his life over from scratch. In 1983, he put me, my sister, and my Mom in the car, and headed to Florida with no job, no place to live, and only $1,200 to his name. My Dad left it all to happenstance. To his dying day, he couldn’t fathom consequences.

Yet on the very day I was born, my father went to the liquor store, and bought a bottle of Dom Perignon, which he planned to open up on my wedding day. Indeed, when we got in the car and drove from Brooklyn to Florida, most of our belongings⎯clothes and furniture⎯that’s the stuff that went in the moving van. But the items you don’t trust to the movers⎯the items you take directly in the car with you⎯that’s not stuff. That’s your life. And the ONLY items I remember in that car with us were the two bottles of champagne that sat behind our backseat headrests, rolling back and forth and baking in the sun. My Dad knew nothing about taking care of champagne, but those bottles were us. We were his life.

It was the one plan my father made. And the only plan he never gave up on⎯the only plan of his existence: Being that loving father to me and my sister. Making sure that if he had to sacrifice himself and take it square in the chest, the lightning would never strike twice.

And of course, that extended to his grandchildren.

I will be blunt here: I know my Dad loved me. He loved me as much as any father has ever loved any son. But. He loved his grandkids more.

He knew the sports gene skipped my generation. But it didn’t skip his Jonas. My father never missed a game. Never. A few weeks back, his health was so bad, he could barely stand at the baseball practice. So he drove his car up near the fence and simply watched from the front seat of his car. And this was just a practice.

It was the same with his Lila. He couldn’t walk a few months ago either. But that didn’t stop him from taking her⎯alone⎯to Aventura Mall, where he let Lila walk him from the Disney Store, to the opposite end of the mall, then back again when she finally picked out what she really wanted. You’ve seen my father walk⎯the way he’d hurl himself forward with each lumbering step. I know that walk hurt my father. But he made it for Lila.

And same for Theo, named after his Teri. Just yesterday, we found even more cars and presents and little videos that my Dad had stashed away just for him. It is why, in his coffin right now, my father is wearing a baseball cap. It says, “Best Pop Ever.”

I know where he first learned how to be that kind of Dad: he saw it in my mother’s father⎯my Poppy Benjamin. Like my father’s father, Benjamin came from nothing. But instead of an angry, permanent chip set into his shoulder, my mother’s father was filled with calm and satisfaction⎯content with the richness that came from nothing more than a loving family. To this day, I believe that relationship⎯between my father and his father-in-law, my Poppy Benjamin⎯was as vital to my father’s existence as his own relationship with my Mom.

And I know he learned it from my Mom, who loved him as passionately as he loved her. I know the word “passion” is an overused one, especially when describing a marriage. But that’s what my parents were.

When they met, my Mom actually had a date with another boy that night. My Dad said to her, “Let’s go talk.” Three hours later, she broke the date. Even back then, my Dad was the sensei of schmooze.

But it was a perfect match. Neither of them apologized for who they were. If they loved you, you knew it. If they hated you, you knew it too. They loved hard, and played hard, fought hard, and went out to Studio 54 until three in the morning back in the Seventies. They had high times and low times, but man, did those two love each other⎯which is all any marriage can hope for. And in the end, especially the way he missed her, they died like any other rock stars: disappearing young rather than fading silently away.

Without question, my Mom always knew that the big-tough-Stewie may’ve been the role he was taught to play…but deep down, it was the big soft mushy-hearted guy who was really at my Dad’s core.

Still…to be truthful, in those early years here in Florida, my dad was still a salesman like my grandfather.
He was a loudmouth. Like my grandfather.
He had a temper. Like my grandfather.
But somewhere along the way, my father started building his own life.

I remember just a few years after we moved here, going on an insurance sales call with my Dad. The entire way, he told me about the people we were going to see…what their family was like…what Italian restaurant they told him about…where their kids were going to school.

My father didn’t just come to sell you (though, yes, of course he did that). He came to get into your life.

Of course, that’s the reason people kept buying insurance from my Dad. If you wanted cheaper prices and good, informed service…he wasn’t your best bet. But thousands of people paid more and spent the little bit extra on their insurance just because their plan came with that added benefit: my father.

For Stewie, as everyone called him, that ability to talk to you⎯or any stranger⎯was primal. And yes, it’d be easy to say that it came from a need to connect…from a hole that was never filled by his own father. But y’know what my Dad would say to that? “That’s a buncha bullshit.”

What made my father different from every person in this room is that my Dad loved to connect. He loved to kibitz. My father is in the Guinness Book of kibitzing and making friends. Don’t believe me?

- In the history of the state of Florida, my father is the only person wearing a baseball cap in his driver’s license photo⎯and that was even before he had the scars on his forehead. He talked the DMV into it.

- At his dentist’s office, they told me that even when they had the tools down his throat, he was still talking.

- When he went into the hospital, his beloved Jennifer, the waitress from Bagel Cove, visited multiple time to see how he was doing.

- He then, last year, got invited to the wedding of the receptionist at the dentist office. Did you hear that? Y’know that receptionist that everyone walks right past? My Dad got invited to her wedding.

- Over the years, sure, my father made lots of enemies. But look around. He made far more friends.

I know. My father was a walking contradiction. The first to point out the hot girl at the baseball game…and then he’d go home and watch his favorite movies: chick flicks like Must Love Dogs. Serendipity (his favorite). He raised me on Cannonball Run and Three Stooges, but as he got older, my Dad loved sappy crappy movies. In one moment, he was loud and cursing and telling the most offensive dirty jokes…but then he’d be bringing everyone in the dentist’s office chocolates on Valentine’s Day (which he did⎯how else do you think he got invited to the wedding?). As my Mom knew, he was a mush at heart. And it was that soft mushy spot that was the most attractive part of him. THAT’S what let him connect the way he did.

Yes, he could turn on a dime, and had that temper, and he was always his own biggest worst enemy⎯but if you watered him with kindness, no one⎯repeat⎯no one produced more love. He had a neverending well of generosity that he shared with anyone he could possibly engage, from the haircutter…the dry cleaner…the dentist…the valets who parked his car…the motherland of Bagel Cove…if you flew with him, he’d walk the aisles of the plane, working the crowd, and by the time he landed, he’d have sold fifty books and have half a dozen new people that he’d brought into his life. You think they were just acquaintances. They were friends.

It became even clearer after the past few weeks and news spread that he was sick. Every single day, there’d be a new person in the hospital, visiting him. I didn’t know any of them⎯and I certainly had no idea of the impact he’d had on their lives. But they all knew about Jonas and Lila and Theo and me⎯and they all came⎯all of them telling me how much they loved Stewie.

I always knew he was a family man. But until recently, I don’t think I ever appreciated the role he played in this community. When I walked into Bagel Cove a few days after my father died, they were passing out photocopies⎯dozens of copies⎯of the funeral details since so many people had asked. On the back of the paper placemats, one of the waitresses said that she was collecting phone numbers of people who wanted updates on my Dad. As she unfolded the sheet, it was filled with names and numbers.

And so, thank you to all of you⎯the people who looked out for my father all these years. I appreciate every single one of you in a way I can’t express. It takes a village to raise a Stewie. But it also take a Stewie to make a village.

A special thanks to those who took care of him after my Mom died: Jennifer and all his pals at Bagel Cove, where, yes, they will be naming a daily special after my father. All the valets as his place. Plus my pals Mike Lemont and Wayne Pollak, the two doctors who looked out for him and all of us.

In the end, during my last real conversation with my father, I knew he was on his deathbed. We’d decided not to tell him to go be with my Mom⎯we knew he was too scared of being sick and didn’t want to panic him. But when everyone left the room, I told my Dad two things I wanted him to hear. And one of them was this: That as my Dad, he was never like his own father. Never.

To this day, I know where my ability to kibbitz comes from. And my love of dumb comedies. And my ability to curse. And fight. And lose my temper, especially if you mess with my family. And love my kids with such intense, blind love that I swear I can outshine the sun.
I know that any strength or confidence I have comes from that love my father⎯and mother⎯built as a foundation in me.
I know that that love will never recede, especially when he said to me, a few years ago when things weren’t going well, the words that I repeat to myself every day: “You’re still our little boy.”

I know my father gave me my best parts. But no one gave him his.

Stewie Meltzer found his own best parts on his own. He hunted and collected them and found them in his wife, in her family especially my Poppy and the Katzs, in us, in the Flams, in my Uncle Jeff and Aunt Debbie and of course, in every single one of you.

Everything my Dad got in life, he fought for. Especially when it came to kindness. But that was also the very first thing he gave back.

He lived loud, and proud, and always with his heart out on his sleeve.

But best of all, he proved once and for all that love is a far more powerful force than lightning.

I love you, Pop.

Hugs for YOU

2011-02-07T11:02:00.001-05:00

I'm now finally home after the long tour (me to my kids: "Hi, I'm your father. Remember me?"). And yes, there's truly only one thing that needs to be said: thankyouthankyouthankYOU for what you did for us when you supported this book. From voting on the original title, to facebooking the release, to coming out to events, to buying it that first week when the sales really count, and most important, for all the nice notes you sent -- it was ALL appreciated. Every darn part.

Last night, as we aired the last episode of Decoded (which sent my son to bed terrified that Florida will soon be underwater), all I kept saying to Cori was how lucky we felt to have you in our world. I've said it before, and I'll say it for everything we do: I know other authors have family and friends. But they don't have OUR family and friends.

So that warm fuzzy feeling you're now getting is coming from me (or you have a minor rash). I have no idea if Decoded will be renewed. For sure working on the sequel to The Inner Circle. But whatever happens, I'm sending you much love and thanks for letting us dream all the silly things we've been able to dream. And yes, I'm still trying to get a free car from History Channel. I've asked them for one for you too. No joke.

Love and thanks and even more mushy stuff,

Brad

Does Fiction Matter?

2011-01-10T19:46:00.004-05:00

The Saturday Evening Post asked me if fiction matters. Here's my answer. (And if you're a new reader of the blog, Hi there. Don't steal nothin').

Does Fiction Matter?
By Brad Meltzer

Simple question, right? Does fiction matter?

As a novelist, I’m supposed to say yes. I have to say yes. But. I hate when someone says I have to do something.

So fiction doesn’t matter. It doesn’t. It shouldn’t.

It’s not real. It’s all made up. It’s just the imagined, make-believe ramblings of people whose only real qualification is access to a pencil. Indeed, by definition, fictional stories are, in the words of my sister, “total BS.” They never really happened - and therefore should have no impact on our everyday existence.

But then I keep thinking: Why do we ban books?

Fiction’s just nonsense, right? It’s inconsequential. Just made up.

So. Why do we ban books?

Let me tell you why.

Because books are powerful. Stories are powerful. They’re recipes made of hopes and dreams and fears. Stories transport us to new places, and show us things we could never see, and reveal the darkest parts of our souls.

Stories educate us, terrify us, and even protect us.

Jay Gatsby was the one who warned us of the dangers of our own excesses during the 1920s. Superman swooped to the rescue and gave America hope during the terrifying early days of World War II. Scout and Atticus showed us our racism, but also showed us the people who we aspire to be - who we want to be - and who we can be. And even today, it’s Harry Potter who reminds generations of young and old that magic still exists.

And that’s why books get banned. That’s why they ban Maya Angelou and Judy Blume and Mark Twain. Because stories change us.

In Huckleberry Finn, people thought they were getting the story about a boy. Instead, Mark Twain gave them a manifesto. A challenge. An uncompromising fistfight about injustice and slavery. People thought they were getting a book. But Mark Twain knew that if you really want to teach people something, you need to tell them a story.

The best part is, it’s nothing new. Fables have taught morality since the very first story was told by the very first storyteller.

Fiction is how we share - and not just how we share our dreams - it’s how we share ourselves. And perhaps more important, how we connect.

When Alexander McCall Smith, a fiction writer, was faced with vocal readers who disagreed with what he’d done to the imaginary characters in his book, he became all too aware that “the world of fiction and the world of real flesh-and-blood people are not quite as separate as one might imagine. Writing is a moral act: What you write has a real effect on others, often to a rather surprising extent.”

I love that. I love that the world of make-believe lives so darn close to the real one. And not just to crazy people, like the woman who writes to me in only gold lowercase letters. Indeed, as my fellow mystery writer P.D. James points out, something as simple as the good guy catching the bad guy at the end of the story is exactly why the traditional detective story “confirms our belief, despite some evidence to the contrary, that we live in a rational, comprehensible, and moral universe."

I know, I know - that sounds overblown. Too philosophical.

So let’s just cut to the facts: According to the Library of Congress, after the Bible, y’know what’s cited as the number one book that’s made a difference in people’s lives? To Kill A Mockingbird.

Read that again. Number 1: the Bible. Number 2: To Kill A Mockingbird.

Mockingbird is fiction.

Make-believe.

Total BS.

This is where Atticus says, “I rest my case.” But for the stubborn few who still think fiction doesn’t matter, I want you to imagine a world without it. A world without Romeo and Juliet, Don Quioxte, or Ebenezar Scrooge…Sherlock Holmes, Captain Ahab, or Dr. Frankenstein…a world without Charlie Brown, Batman, or the Cat in the Hat. It’s a world without fiction - a world without dreams and -

Wait.

That’s a great idea for a book.

Brad Meltzer is the bestselling author of The Inner Circle. His new TV show, Brad Meltzer’s Decoded, is on History Channel - and deals with real life mysteries. Not fictional ones.

Deep Throat

2011-01-04T15:46:00.002-05:00

Here it is -- world premiere of the TV commercial for The Inner Circle (with the best gravel-voice EVAH)!

Two books ago, they had me do the voiceover -- and then everyone asked: Who's that woman?

This will be running on TV starting on publication day, Tuesday, 1/11.

video link

Decoded Premiere

2010-12-03T13:25:00.001-05:00

Thanks to everyone who watched the Decoded premiere last night on History Channel. And the love you've been sending means so so much. Can't even tell you how many times it's made bring the tears. The one thing I have to share is the experience of watching it with my family last night, all of us gathered around the screen:

Without question, my oldest son now hates -- HATES -- Harry Truman. In order of hate, it goes:

Truman
Nixon

Daughter watched for 15 minutes, then, bored, whispered to me, "When're you coming back on screen?" And walked away.

And youngest son spent ENTIRE episode playing new gift: a drum set. Yes. Drums. Nice quiet beautiful perfect night (with lots of hate for that bastard Harry Truman).

Love you much.

For Hanukkah

2010-12-01T09:08:00.002-05:00

For Hanukkah, I give you this gift: www.MyFamilyIsMoreJewishThanYours.com.

Ordinary Heroes

2010-11-04T10:16:00.001-04:00

I get fun mail. And hate mail. And sad mail. But this is the best mail -- and the entire reason I wrote Heroes For My Son. Never forget the heroes you see every day.

Dear Mr. Meltzer,

Two months ago, this past week, my thirty-six year old sister, Renee, was diagnosed with GlioBlastoma Stage 4 brain cancer. It has taken its toll, not only on my sister, as I'm sure you could imagine, but on my entire family; my parents, my sisters two children 6 and 7, and her husband, Scott, my wife, Megan and me. Throughout the course of these two horrific months, my sister has undergone and finished her radiation treatments and continues to receive chemo. She has been in and out of Stony Brook University Hospital as well as Sloan in NYC. She initially went to a local hospital, because she had headaches. Who would have thought this? In the course of Renee’s first four weeks with this illness, the two tumors that were found doubled in size. The tumors are lying on a part of the brain that effects her emotions, personality and short term memory. Because of this, they were and still are unoperable. When asked about her prognosis, the doctors said she would have two to four weeks without treatments. My mom, dad and I, have aged, so it seems, ten years in these two months.

Only three months ago, my sister was planning to go back to teaching for her 14th year, driving her boys to their baseball and swimming events and doing everything a parent could do with their children. All of this was taken away that Sunday when she went into the hospital. Prior to her diagnosis – two weeks before, the eight of us, and my one year old son, Matthew, were fortunate enough to take a family trip to Aruba. Will this be the last family trip? Who knows? We are hoping, no, praying for a miracle. Renee recently met with her doctor from Sloan and he was amazed at how well she looked and sounded since he last saw her a few weeks back. After so many negative outcomes, could this be the break we are looking for? (As if there is such a thing.)

On September 11th, just two weeks after my sister Renee’s diagnosis, my sister-in-law, Kaitlin, went into Stony Brook University Hospital after feeling numbness in her tongue, legs and feet. Within one day, she lost the use of her lower half of her body, and within two days, she was paralyzed from the neck down. After the third day, she was put on a respirator and sent to ICU. She was diagnosed with Guillain Barre Syndrome, a rare disease where the immune system attacks the nervous system. Basically, your blood turns bad. With this disease, 90% of patients diagnosed will recover. However, once the first symptoms appear, it gets worse for three weeks before it gets better. I am happy to say that Kaitlin is on the slow road to recovery, and is able to walk, with crutches and a walker. She still needs intense occupational and physical therapy, as she cannot open a soda bottle by herself. The one thing that never strayed, was Kaitlin’s mind. She did question her will to live, and go on.

Through these two separate experiences within my own family, I have learned a ton – especially about everyday heroes, and more importantly,who I am. I can talk about my brother-in-law, Scott- Renee’s husband, and how he has found an inner strength to take care of my sister and his two children. I have learned to be a better dad and husband because of him. I look at my parents, my mom and dad, and how they offer their help, guidance and support to their daughter and her family. I feel as if I have become a better son because of them. I look at their neighbors who have cooked food on a regular basis for the past two months. They even held a fall festival on my sister’s driveway so she could celebrate Halloween with her children and their friends. Perhaps one day, I’ll be that neighbor that can lend that hand. I commend my colleagues and the community that I work for, and where my sister lives, that created fundraisers on my sister’s behalf, sent and continue to send gift cards. I look at my wife, who has been the strength for me, despite what she is going through. I look at her family and see what they have done for Kaitlin. Then I look at Matthew, my son, perhaps the true hero at age 17 months. He is the one who can get me to smile at any moments notice. Sure, he probably senses what going on, but he makes us laugh regardless.

Then there is Renee. My sister. A teacher. A friend. The person who helped me find my way in this world. It’s pretty basic quite honestly. At some point in time we have to face reality and have to make simple decisions that will effect us tomorrow. Fifteen years ago, my sister invited me into her classroom to help her set it up. I was hanging up a bulletin board behind her desk. At that moment, I turned around and had an epiphany. I saw a classroom of students looking at me, instead of empty desks waiting anxiously for those children. I knew then that teaching was for me. I had found my tomorrow, because of my sister. Besides her classroom ways, she taught me to love my child more than anything, and to appreciate my parents. She taught me to set time aside to watch your children play and live. My sister, my hero. Now I look at her, and I see that she is in the fight for her life. I have told her many times how she inspired and continues to inspire me. I can only hope she gets through this, not only for me, but for her own children and family, for my son too, and my mom and dad.

I don't know why, but I feel compelled to write you. You wrote about heroes; those that defied the odds and did things that noone could think possible, especially when others turned their backs. I truly appreciated what you wrote and how simple you made these heroes sound. I cannot wait to share these stories with my son when he is old enough. I have been sharing these stories with the 5th grade students whom I teach, since I bought this books less than two weeks ago. My fifth graders are now turning my questions about what you wrote into writing assignments – if that’s okay with you. Through all of these experiences that you write, it seems like you hit upon- story after story- of what you learned. For that I am grateful and perhaps that’s why I write.

Thank you for allowing me to write my story to you. Everyone of us has a hero within us. At times we lose that sense, especially with all the negativity in the world. Perhaps that’s why you wrote this book too. It’s these trying moments that define who we are as people. Please continue to show and talk to your children about these heroes, yet continue to show them that there are heroes within all of us, and you don’t have to look to far to see that. Besides, I’m sure they already look at you that way!

Respectfully,

Mark Yashowitz

RIP Stephen J. Cannell

2010-10-05T14:26:00.001-04:00

Yes, Stephen Cannell was responsible for my childhood. But he was also one of the nicest guys around. So nice, in fact, that when we wanted to use the Greatest American Hero theme on the soundtrack for The Book of Lies, I called him to ask who owned the rights.

Sony told me Warner Brothers owned them.

"Warners doesn't own them," Stephen told me in his beautifully insistent and wise-by-time tone.

"Then who does?" I asked.

"I do," he replied.

"Uh," I stuttered. "Can we have them?"

And that's all it took. He gave them to us -- free -- just one novelist helping another. (And yes, for those who didn't know, Stephen spent the rest of his career as a novelist -- a dyslexic one -- struggling to put the words down, but never letting it stop him. Go buy his books). I loved him for that persistence. And for teaching me about ownership. And for giving me the A-Team, the Greatest American Hero, and those end credits with him pulling the paper from the typewriter. As I said, my childhood.

Rest well, Mr. H.

David Thompson

2010-09-14T11:18:00.000-04:00

Just now heard about the death of David Thompson, who ran Houston's premiere mystery bookstore, Murder By The Book. David hosted one of my first signings ever when The Tenth Justice was FIRST published. For the first hour, nobody showed. Not one person. Then, two friends showed up (a law school pal and her Mom). That was the grand total: two customers and one was her Mom. I know we were supposed to look at that signing as a disaster, but David and I never did. We went out to the movies after and laughed our asses off watching South Park. I remember thanking him so much for taking a chance on an unknown like me. At the time, the bookstore around the corner from my parents' apartment wouldn't invite me to sign there -- but David said, "No. We need to support the first time authors. Come to Houston."

That was his great gift. I owe him forever for that.

In fact, for the past few books, my publisher had stopped sending me to Houston (media was too sparse there) -- but David and I conspired when The Book of Lies was published. I was going back. The day before I got there, the hurricane hit Houston, shutting the entire city down. I still tried to get in. And when one friend in Houston told me her living room was knee-deep in water, I called David and he was in the store, all set for business. Man, we should all love books like that.

For me, the highway from Austin to Houston was shut down, so no Murder By The Book for me. But David and I were still determined, and months ago, we rebooked my return visit for The Inner Circle this January.

I'll be there. David won't. And I don't care if there's another hurricane -- or only two more people join us -- we'll be raising a glass in his honor.

Miss you , pal. And thank you.

- b

Comicon Report

2010-07-27T10:19:00.004-04:00

Just now back from taking my son to Comicon for the first time for the full indoctrination. And while so much of the fun of Comicon these days is bitching about how good Comicon used to be in the old days, lemme just say, it's still a wet dream for me. I did one panel, but avoided all meetings, all interviews -- and just spent days talking comics with my boy and taking him to see Iron Man armor, Cap's shield, dead Green Lantern bodies, and even HR Puff n Stuff (to make me feel young). Puff n Stuff! Plus lots of time at Legoland and the San Diego zoo.

Special thanks to all those who came to the panel with myself, Paul Feig, Chip Kidd, Whitney Matheson and Michael Uslan. Was convinced that -- being up against Green Lantern and Harry Potter -- it might just be the five of us there, but you saved us and made our collective months.

Also, super thanks to the marketing guy who let my son in to see the Tron arcade even though it was officially closed. I didn't ask for any special favors. I didn't play the "I work in comics" card. And unlike the reporter guy who snuck in behind me, who was insisting that he works at a "huge site," and hinting that he'd get them free press or crush them below his heel, I just stood there and told the truth: "My boy just digs Tron." So thanks for that. You brainwashed him the best way of all: with kindness.

I know, I know, collective awwww. But still, Tron! Plus, HR Puff n Stuff!

Meltzer's Greatest Dance Mix

2010-07-22T10:12:00.000-04:00

Last night was my wife's 40th -- and in honor of it, I spent the afternoon reassembling the original greatest dance mix known to humankind -- the mix that was used in every single college party I was at: Please Meltz Don't Hurt Em.

Admittedly, it was missing a few of the songs from the seminal mixes -- Meltz E. Fresh -- and the controversial Meltz E. Soul (c'mon, iTunes, like I'm gonna buy the whole De La Soul album to get one song. I forever boycott such dickishness).

But with this, you will be able to recapture your youth. Special thanks to the Notorious W.E.I.S.S for helping recreate it (it was like building Frankenstein -- with lighting and thunder and extra Miami beats). Enjoy the weekend. And notice how I slowed it down in the end...just for you...

Please Meltz Don't Hurt Em - Greatest Dance Mix to Humankind by Brad Meltzer:

Apache, The Sugarhill Gang
Supersonic, J.J. Fad
Bust a move
IT takes two
Baby got back
Ice Ice Baby, Vanilla Ice
Peter Piper, Run-DMC
Joy and Pain
Party Up, DMX
Big Pimpin', Jay-Z
It's Tricky, Run-DMC
Work It, Missy Elliott
Poison, Bell Biv DeVoe
Mercy (feat. The Game)vDuffy
Let Me Clear My Throat, DJ Kool
Throw the 'D', 2 Live Crew
Give It to Me (feat. Justin Timberlake & Nelly Furtado), Timbaland
The Show, Doug E. Fresh
Kiss, Prince And The Revolution
O.P.P.
Creep
Shoop
Tootsie Roll, Boyz
Just a Friend, Biz Markie
Keep On Movin', Soul II Soul
Double Dutch Bus, Frankie Smith
Going Back to Cali, LL Cool J
Rapper's Delight, The Sugarhill Gang

San Diego Schedule

2010-07-15T14:41:00.001-04:00

Here's my San Diego schedule this year. I'm taking my son for the first time and doing no signings, no anything. Just a short panel and enjoying the rest of it as a fan. So here's the one appearance:

Saturday at San Diego Comicon 2010:

12:30-1:30 Comics Across all Media

Paul Feig (creator of Freaks and Geeks), Chip Kidd (Shazam!: The Golden Age of the World's Mightiest Mortal), Whitney Matheson (USA Today's Pop Candy blog), Brad Meltzer (The Inner Circle), and Michael E. Uslan (The Dark Knight) are five superstars who make headlines in television, the graphic arts, journalism, novels, and film. But they all have comics in common. As they reunite for another visit, join them for a discussion of all things nerd. It'll be like a 21st century Breakfast Club -- but with even better references. Moderated by audiobook star Scott Brick (The Chronicles of Thomas Covenant). Room 24ABC

Vook 2: The Wraith of Vook

2010-06-24T11:19:00.001-04:00

As promised, here's the second Vook video, this one for Harry Houdini.

Vook

2010-06-22T17:51:00.003-04:00

I know it looks like a typo, but a vook is a video book, and the nice people who made the vook for Heroes For My Son gave me three free videos to share. So let's share. I must say, when I first heard of the concept, I was, like...why? (kinda like when I predicted that email would never catch on.) But then I saw the real video and imagined showing my kids that. Seeing the real thing. So enjoy...

Here's the Vook for Jesse Owens. And I'll post two more in the next few days...

Why I Love Kodak

2010-06-09T23:05:00.003-04:00

Okay, now that the tour has calmed and my family recognizes me again, I finally got a chance to upload all the photos from the Heroes For My Son book tour to our regular Brad Meltzer Facebook page.

The gallery contains pics of tons of readers, my very first girlfriend, my first best friend ...in Florida, and even the family of a high school friend who died too young. It just reminds me how lucky we are every day. And how many beautiful readers and friends I'm so lucky to be surrounded by. You are the real heroes.

Anyway, special thanks to Kodak for the use of the amazing M530 Easy Share camera. Gave me my true Kodak moments.

Bestseller List

2010-05-20T08:41:00.001-04:00

I'm breaking one of my rules. I never go out there and yell from the rooftops when we get on the bestseller list. And y'know why? Because being on a stupid list doesn't mean anything. It doesn't make me a smarter, nicer, or better person. It just means my family bought a lot of books.

But.

Sometimes you need to say thank you. And I need to say thank you for this: When Heroes For My Son launched, it was seen as a small idealistic book. It didn't have crazy orders. It was always the underdog. And the entire advertising budget for the book was...zero.

Zero dollars.

Not a single ad was bought. Not a single TV or radio or print ad ran. In fact, in the weeks before the launch, the entire imprint that bought the book was shut down. It was an orphan book.

But, as it was launched, it had one thing going for it: you. Yes, you -- our family and friends and beloved readers who supported this little dream of a book. You came out, and supported it, and bought copies for Dads and Grandparents, and kids and new babies. And Kodak came in and believed in that dream. And so did all our friends in the media and in publishing, who have looked out for us since page one. And so did the people at Harper, who took it over.

And that was how the book with zero advertising dollars just made the number two spot on the New York Times bestseller list (which I just got the call about).

So as I finish the tour tonight in Michigan, thank you for believing in this little book -- and in me. It is your love and support of the thrillers that let me do this book for my boys. And it's why it was launched with so much love. And that love is the only damn way to explain anything in this world.

Love on all of you.

PS - Right after we got the news, look what we passed. No kidding.

Heroes For My Son - Dallas Signing

2010-05-18T12:18:00.002-04:00

This is how you welcome someone to Dallas. Never have I seen a bigger balder head on a stadium.

I'll be at Borders tonight at 7:00 PM

View Larger Map

All Things Considered, NPR Interview

2010-05-12T09:46:00.000-04:00

From All Things Considered (NPR) -- me talking about Heroes For My Son.

One More Day

2010-05-10T08:49:00.001-04:00

This post is also on Heroes For My Son.

It's now less than twenty-four hours until Heroes For My Son is released into our wild cruel world. So in this quiet little moment, let me tell you the most important thing of all: thank you. Thank you for what you've always done for all of us. If it weren't for you buying the other stuff, I don't get to do this one. And this one is just so personal to me.

As I've said before and will say again, this isn't a book to me. It's a dream. More important, it's my dream for my son -- and it's something I thought up on the very first night Jonas was born eight years ago. Is that schmaltzy? You better believe it is. But I want my son to learn that too. And I hope that whoever you give it to -- Dad, Grandparents, Mom, teacher, or child -- I hope they get the joy that I had building it.

In fact, to show you what I'm talking about, take a look at this, which answers the real question my son asked me (and also gives you the first peek at some of the heroes inside).

Link to YouTube

My Mom

2010-05-04T10:24:00.004-04:00

With less than a week to go until the release of Heroes For My Son, things are getting crazy here. But even with all that's going on, nothing in my professional life has hit me as hard as putting together this video. Anyone with a mother will understand.

We usually go through a few drafts when we do a video. Here, we went through dozens of edits, tweaks, etc. This one had to be perfect. It's for my Mom.

So yes, she's in the book along with Jim Henson, Rosa Parks and Mr. Rogers.

Of course, feel free to forward to your own Mom. And happy Mother's Day to all.

Call Your Mother - Brad Meltzer's Mom (YouTube)

Calling All Members!

2010-04-21T10:20:00.000-04:00

Okay, we're officially 3 weeks away from the launch of Heroes For My Son.

As we do with every book, just want to know who wants to help by being part of our oh-so-glamorous Invisible Army (who every book saves our tushies like nobody's business). If you're up for it, please email me here or at bradmeltzer44 AT gmail.com with the message: "I'm in." We'll do the rest.

Love you like Milano cookies.

-b

April Fool

2010-04-02T10:16:00.002-04:00

Holy jeez. Never, in all my years of having an April first birthday, have I ever had a prank this good played on me (though when I used to sell classified ads and all my clients canceled their ads on the same day, leaving me broke, that was close).

So thanks to my wife Cori -- and all my fellow creative pals -- and all the sites that helped post it. Every damn one of them is a place (and person) I love to read. My wife knows me well -- and it was nice to know that if she wanted to cheat on me, I clearly would have no idea.

Also, best part? My film agent who called and said, "I believed it.". Thanks for the faith. To see the full prank:

From my pal Whitney's Pop Candy USA Today blog.
From Publishers Weekly.
From ComicBookResources.
From IGN.
From Newsarama.
From ComicAlliance.
And from the beautiful Geoff Boucher and the LA Times Hero Complex.

But most of all, thanks to all the family and friends who sent love. You know I don't have "readers." I have family and friends. Always have. That's the ONLY reason I get to still do this and on a day like my birthday -- when I usually get all sappy and sad -- thanks for making me feel so blessed. I never ever forget you're there. Ever.

If I could buy each of you something expensive -- like a first-class Bar Mitzvah -- I would.

xoxo

Don't Tell Me The Odds

2010-03-25T10:10:00.001-04:00

This post is also on Heroes For My Son.

I just love this story about the one person out of four million who picked the perfect bracket. It's so simple. So perfect. And it just defies the odds.

There is no impossible (don't tell my son that -- he's still pissed he got a few wrong).

From ESPN.Com

Autistic teen picks perfect bracket
By Eamonn Brennan

ESPN's Tournament Challenge is currently hosting 4.78 million -- yes, million -- 2010 NCAA tournament bracket entries. After two rounds, not a single one of them is perfect . But the feat has, miraculously enough, been accomplished.

Who did it? His name is Alex Herrman, and he's a 17-year-old student at Glenbrook South High School in Glenview, Ill., one of Chicago's north suburbs. Herrmann, who is autistic, picked all the wild upsets you and I didn't see happening. UNI over Kansas. Ohio over Georgetown. Cornell over Wisconsin. Your bracket may have survived. Your bracket might be good. Herrmann's bracket is 100 percent perfect.

"It's amazing," Hermann said. "I'm good at math. I'm kind of good at math and at stats I see on TV during the game."

Alex entered the bracket on CBSsports.com's bracket challenge. CBS did not return several phone calls to confirm entries into its game. His 24-year-old brother Andrew, who helped him enter his picks into CBS' bracket manager, also entered the contest -- and ranks behind 500,000 other people.

“My bracket is totally shot,” his 24-year-old brother Andrew said. “So is everyone else I know.”

Us too, Andrew. Us too.

In case you needed the visual proof, NBC Chicago has the PDF right here . Another fun fact: According to Book Of Odds , the chances of picking the first two rounds of this NCAA tournament are one in 13,460,000, which means you have a better chance of winning the lottery twice over.

Two rounds is incredibly impressive, obviously, but the next step is seeing if Alex's picks can go the distance. Can he complete the holy grail? Can he seal the perfect bracket? Herrmann's Final Four is a bit dubious -- he has Tennessee coming out of the Midwest and Purdue overcoming the Robbie Hummel injury to make it out of the South -- not to mention the fact that the odds of attaining a perfect bracket are 1 in 35,360,000,000. (Or, according to Book Of Odds, "almost 18 times worse than your odds of being killed by a waterspout in a year [1 in 1,988,000,000]." So, um, yeah.) But doubting Alex now means doubting the one person who managed to get the entire bracket correct. In other words, I'm not going to do it.

My First Love

2010-03-18T10:14:00.001-04:00

Today is my 15th wedding anniversary. But more insane, it's been 25 years since I met her in junior high. And so, in honor of my love Cori, I love pulling out this old story...

My First Lady
By Brad Meltzer

Our story starts like this: She was the captain of the cheerleaders; I had just moved to Florida from Brooklyn. She was wavy hair, green eyes, and a red scrunchie; I was in puberty. She was popular; I was unknown. She was beautiful; I was entranced. She liked to laugh; I was (somewhat) funny. In time, we met. I was fifteen.

Like most of us at that age, I really didn't think I would marry the person I was taking to my junior high school prom. I was far more concerned with the pressing questions of that now-gone time: Can I afford this limo? Does my hair have enough mousse in it? And if I pin the corsage on her chest, does that mean I got to second base? Even though the answer to all these questions was yes, I still didn't think we were going to get married. Why? Because of the most obvious assumption that currently exists about high school sweethearts: They never get married.

Scoff if you must, but the assumption is real. To prove it, I conducted my own independent survey. Randomly dialing seven-digit phone numbers, I called five people and said to them: "I married my high school sweetheart. What's your reaction?" The responses were as follows:

FIRST PERSON: "Who cares?"

SECOND PERSON: "Who is this?"

THIRD PERSON: "I'm not answering that."

FOURTH PERSON: "Who is this?"

FIFTH PERSON: "What are you doing a survey for?"

Clearly, not a single person believed I had married my high school sweetheart. But quite honestly, I don't care.

When I first met her, Cori was fourteen. Today, she's twenty-six. We've been dating the entire time. Corny? Yes. For real? Absolutely. Make you sick? Perhaps. But whenever I tell people we're high school sweethearts, the reactions are surprisingly similar. They go something like this:

FEMALE STRANGER: "Oh, that is so wonderful. I love hearing stories like that."

SELFISH MALE STRANGER: "I hate to say it, but that's pretty cool." (Subtext: "I wish you were dead.")

NORMAL MALE STRANGER: "Wow, that's great. That's really great." (Subtext: "I wish you were dead.")

The questions people ask me about our relationship also tend to be similar. Roughly generalized, they are usually one (if not all) of the following: (1) When did you know she was "the one"? (2) Don't you feel like you missed out? And (3) How did it happen?

And now, so you don't actually have to find someone who married his high school sweetheart, here are the answers.

QUESTION 1: When did you know she was "the one"?

ANSWER: The moment I saw her. When she walked past my history class, I was immediately smitten. But did I know at that exact moment that she would be my wife? Did I imagine the wedding and the reception and the four unreturnable Crock-Pots? Of course not. All I knew was that I wanted to know her. I wanted to be near her. I wanted her to know me. And that's how it is for many couples today: Whether they've known each other for twelve years, twelve minutes, or twelve seconds, first contact was more visceral than cerebral. When I first saw Cori, I wanted to meet the cheerleader. It wasn't until I graduated from college that I knew I wanted to be with her forever.

QUESTION 2: Don't you feel like you missed out?

ANSWER: Nope. In college, (I went to Michigan; she went to Harvard), we put our relationship to the real test and decided to see other people to make sure we knew what we were missing. If we were going to get married, the last thing we wanted to do was look back at our college years and say, "Damn, why didn't we take advantage of that?" Like most living, breathing human beings, we wanted to lick the lollipop of life. So we did.

It wasn't easy. Although we never broke up, I didn't visit her when she was dating someone else, and she didn't visit me when there was someone I was seeing. Without question, it was the hardest and worst part of our relationship. If I called her room on a Saturday night and no one answered, she got the interrogation on Sunday morning. If she couldn't reach me, I got the same.

When I look back on it, it was a twisted game—a sort of self-inflicted agony that was endured for an unguaranteed future opportunity. But what an opportunity. And when our four years were over, the experiment complete, I had my answers: Other women were always fun, and usually attractive, and sometimes wild, but none of them made me laugh like Cori. None of them made me as angry as Cori. None of them made me as happy as Cori. They may've been nice and cute and pretty and all the other positive adjectives, but none of them could ever touch me, down to my core, like Cori.

QUESTION 3: How did it happen?

ANSWER: To me, this question is the most interesting of the three. Not just because of what it asks, but how it's asked. When people ask Question 1, their tone is one of natural curiosity. When they ask Question 2, their tone expresses disbelief—as if they can't accept the fact that anything can ever be that perfect. But Question 3 is usually asked with a heaping dose of delighted—and sometimes envious—amazement.

In today's world of fractured and hard-to-find relationships, people seem genuinely excited by the idea that a couple could last through the awkward and mercurial stage of life known as teenagedom. As if somehow the existence of high school sweethearts means that stability and commitment and true love are indeed possible for all of us. And that society's quest for simpler ideas and times will finally, joyfully, be achieved. In this third question, people aren't just asking, "How did you do it?" They're also asking, "How can I do it, too?"

So how did we do it? Like most relationships, ours took time to progress. There was no single, magical, warm, mushy, fuzzy-bunny, Hollywoodized moment. Slowly, over time, we stepped forward together. I knew I loved Cori's laugh, and the way she completes my sentences, and the way she looks when she wakes up in the morning, and the way she picks a fight when she disagrees with someone. But is that what makes a good relationship? Of course not. True love is more than a few trite examples.

Eventually, I simply realized that no matter how many women I dated—no matter how interesting, no matter how pretty, no matter how new and exciting they were—none of them could offer me what my high school girlfriend offered me. Unlike my college flings, Cori knew me in a way no one else ever could. She knew my history. This history, however, can't adequately be explained in a mushy narrative. It takes an anecdotal narrative to do it justice. So here goes:

My wife and I were driven to our first date by my parents.
She knew (personally) all of my high school friends.
She knew me when I wore parachute pants.
She knew (personally) all the people I didn't like in high school.
She knew me when I liked Journey.
I saw The Breakfast Club with her (in the theater, smart guy).
I was there the day she got her license.
We studied for the SAT together.
She helped me paint signs when I ran for student government president.
She was in the car when I got my first speeding ticket (the cop called my parents—it was a laugh riot).
I knew her when she was into that Flashdance look.
We celebrated together the day I was accepted to college.
She knew my dad when he had hair.
She was there when the captain of the football team wanted to beat me up.
She was there when my grandfather died.
We went to the senior prom together.
I was her first; she was mine.

Years ago, when I graduated from college, my roommate and I loaded up a U-Haul and drove our belongings to Boston. On the way, we stopped by his parents' house in Dix Hills, New York. I had known him for four years. He was my best friend from college. I knew most of his fears, hopes, and dreams. Without question, I knew who he was. But it wasn't until I walked into his house and saw the room where he grew up that I finally understood where he came from.

Not only did I experience the smell and texture and reality of his childhood—I also saw the pieces of his earlier years: the dozens of trophies he'd won on the track team (he gave up running when he left for college), the clothes he used to wear (lots of suspenders), even the Knight Rider poster that still hung on his wall (hey, we all had a freaky stage). For all of us, the minutiae of our childhoods are the building blocks of our current identities.

For my wife and me, and for most high school sweethearts, the results are the same. Since we met at such a young age, our identities are intertwined. We've spent most of our years together and internalized the word "we." Indeed, our wedding was perhaps the best allegory for our relationship. When we were married, no one asked, "Bride's side or groom's side?" There were no "sides." Because we'd been together so long (twelve years, for those keeping score), there wasn't a person there who didn't know us as a couple.

Does it mean we're more in love? No. Do we understand each other better than most couples? Not necessarily. Do we have better sex? Maybe (think cheerleading skirt). Do we have a better relationship than every other couple on the planet? Doubtfully. In truth, marrying your high school sweetheart is kind of like spending the day with a longtime friend. You have multitudes of shared experiences. So if you pick the right person, you're going to have more to laugh about; if you pick the wrong person, your day is going to suck. Period.

Whenever I meet someone new, I love asking about his or her childhood: where they grew up, where they went to school, what their first job was, what their parents were like. We're not all just the sum of our individual experiences. But if you find out that your girlfriend used to dig the Smurfs, you're probably going to be standing in line at a few too many Disney movies.

As for me and my wife, our twenty-year high school reunion was last year. Neither of us dreaded it. I didn't need to give her the lowdown on everyone; she didn't have to introduce me to everyone she encountered. With my wife, I share my unwritten history. And because of that, she already knows I used to dig the Smurfs.

Send This One To Your Grandmother

2010-03-16T10:29:00.001-04:00

This blog is also posted on Heroes For My Son.

When I was little, my Grandmother used to take me to the library. She's the one who introduced me to all those books. Her and all those librarians.

So here's a new hero that someone sent me over the weekend... Boy, I feel like Casey Kasem doing a long distance dedication. But I used to love those dedications, so...this one goes out to Seth.

From: Seth Moore

My Hero: My grandma

For as long as I've been able to remember (though not my entire life), by grandpa has been restricted to a wheelchair. There was no great accident that made him this way, but rather a rare, incurable disease called attaxia. Attaxia eats away at the region of the brain controlling motor functions, slowly causing the victim to become paralyzed, be incapable of speech, and eventually leads to choking to death.

As of today, he is losing his awareness, though whether that is from the disease or just aging, I'm not sure. He sleeps nearly 20 hours a day, and eats very little. I suppose he is a little more "manageable" now than he used to be, but my grandma has never thought of him in that light.

I am 20 years old. I have never once heard her say a negative comment toward him. She worships him, always praising him for what a wonderful man he is, for his integrity, for how much he loves for her given the limited means he has for expressing it. She considers her task of caring for him to be the greatest calling God could give her.

She prays with him daily. She reads the Bible to him because he is no longer able to hold a book steady or turn the pages. He is always the most lucid with her. He is never a burden.

If all of this were not enough, my aunt has the same disease. While she is obviously younger, it progressed in her much more quickly and at a younger age. Sadly, her husband does not consider caring for her to be the joy that my grandmother finds. After years of emotional abuse and neglect, my aunt finally separated from him to live with my grandparents. Grandma cares for both her husband and her daughter.

It was about a year ago that my grandparents and my aunt moved from their lifelong home an hour from my family to a new home twelve hours north. Another daughter/sister lives up there with her family, and she is an RN. They now live in the best assisted living complex I have ever seen, and life is so much easier. My uncle comes over every morning to sit my grandpa up, strap him to a machine to move him to his wheelchair, help bathe him, dress him, take him to the restroom. But in the end, it all comes back to my grandma and her almost stubborn loyalty to this man.

Lunch with 41

2010-02-12T15:47:00.001-05:00

Had lunch with George HW Bush and Barbara, whose first words to me were "You took off your hair!"

Percy Jackson's First Kiss

2010-02-04T11:25:00.002-05:00

My pals on @eitmonline asked Percy Jackson star Logan Lerman about the fact that I helped write his first kiss on Jack & Bobby. I still love Logan. And was as nervous as he was on set. Okay, he was more nervous. A hundred of us were watching.

Buffy!

2010-02-03T11:28:00.002-05:00

My first issue of Buffy the Vampire Slayer is out today. Has my most nerd moment ever. Yep. That's sayin something.

And for those afraid of comic stores (and you shouldn't be), you can go here (Atomic Comics)

We Want To See Your Child!

2010-01-07T10:39:00.003-05:00

Did you videotape your child being born (I don't mean the gorey parts, or parts with nudity -- I mean the part where the baby is handed to Mom/Dad for the very first time. The nice for TV part)? You did? Great. Can you...er...send it to us for free? I mean it. With Heroes For My Son approaching, we're again looking for help from the Invisible Army (read: all of you amazing people out there who over and over again help us). Thusly, as we make the first video for the book, we're looking for the following footage (especially that delivery room moment):

any hospital footage of newborn babies and fathers/mothers being handed/holding the baby for the first time
a boy (elementary or kindergarten) playing with an airplane toy
a boy with a video camera
a boy performing a magic trick
a boy playing with toy doctor’s tools
a boy writing letters or doing “writing” school work
an elementary school boy playing a musical instrument or a toddler banging on or playing with one, or singing with a real or toy microphone, or at a concert/pageant
a boy in a grade school play
a boy in cap and gown at elementary or high school graduation
a junior high or high school boy giving a speech

If you have such footage, please shoot me an email and I'll tell you where to send it. As always, I'm at bradmeltzer27 [at] gmail.com. Or through facebook or twitter or anywhere else we pimp.

Much love and thanks for doing this. And yes, we're gonna try and make your little one a star. But in a good way.

Dad's Surgery

2010-01-05T10:30:00.001-05:00

Didn't want to post this until I knew the outcome, but just wanted to let you know that while everyone else was spending their holidays trapped in airports, we spent ours in the hospital, as my Dad had some open heart surgery. Was scary for a bit -- especially when his kidneys decided to stop working and he went into renal failure -- but thankfully, he bounced back and is now home and starting the real recovery.

I will say, it really did put the year into perspective. There's nothing like six days watching someone you love in the intensive care unit to make you thankful for what you have. And I count you as one of those people that I'm thankful for.

So yes, feel free to stop by his facebook page to post good thoughts and whatever other juvenile humor you know he likes best.

Otherwise, here's to a far healthier new year for all with far less hospital visits.

Dad's Underwear

2009-12-11T10:13:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was my Moms birthday. The good news was, I spent it helping my Dad go shopping to make the shift from fruit-smuggler underwear to boxer-briefs. Was easily the funniest, best, most crazy Dad-moment in a long while. But so proud of my Pop for entering the new century. (Special thanks to Craig Rogers, who made me stop wearing those underwear in 1988.)

And yes, I know my Dad's reading this now (because he's friended nearly half of you). But this is how I'm going to get him to laugh. Can't wait to milk all the emotions for a scene in a book. Love you all.

Adoption

2009-11-20T00:21:00.001-05:00

For those who have adopted kids -- or know someone who do, this came to me from the sister of one of my first readers (and now dear friend). Of course, feel free to share with anyone you think needs to hear it:

Brad... my sister is in the process of adopting, and had this conversation with her 4 year old son today (who WILL be getting a copy of your Heroes!):

This morning I was driving Nathan to daycare and we were talking about Batman and Spiderman, as we so often do. He asked about what happened to Batman's mom and dad. I told him that Bruce Wayne's mom and dad had died and that Alfred had helped raise him and stayed with him. He asked about Spiderman, where were his mom and dad. I didn't know but that Peter Parker was raised by his uncle and aunt. And while I was prepared to launch into my favorite "all families are different and as long as there is love its a family" schpeel that I love so dearly, Nathan had his own story to tell. He told me that this would be just like for his new sister. That we aren't her first family but that she'd come live with us and we'd love her forever like Alfred did for Batman. He says he will tell his big sister all about Batman and how families can love you and make you a superhero even if you aren't there as a baby first. Yeah... we're going to be just fine.

Title Of The New Book!

2009-11-18T10:25:00.003-05:00

Here it is. The winner for the title of the new non-fiction book, out this May. And, the very first look at the cover.

Heroes For My Son.

And yes, it was the biggest blowout vote we ever had. Just staggering. Special sorry to my wife, who lost.

Hugs and thanks to all who voted.

First Look at Brad on Buffy The Vampire Slayer

2009-11-09T14:34:00.003-05:00

First cover.

Issue 32.

Out in February.

Georges Jeanty drawing.

And Joss's reaction is about right.

Sesame Street

2009-11-06T09:58:00.001-05:00

Happy 40th Sesame Street. And still have my favorites... Sing it with me. Imagine the old animation and that trippy ball: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5... (YouTube)

Wild Things

2009-10-21T10:19:00.001-04:00

Saw Where The Wild Things Are last night. It has no business being great. But it is. So manipulative. So perfect. It just replays all the operas from your childhood, and for ten bucks, you have your childhood back. I will watch anything Spike Jonze does. Eggers too.

Also, I love this and I'm so jealous of them. Like seeing cool kids who you know could be your friends. I can just feel the Gen Ys getting started. Proof that they'll always be something new for us.

Jumbo's

2009-10-14T15:22:00.002-04:00

Since I'm 15 years old, I've been eating at Jumbo's. I eventually married the owner's daughter. It is a Miami landmark, but it's also the best fried shrimp and chicken anywhere. That's right. Anywhere.

Sadly, because of the economy, it's been losing money by the handful. So take a look at this video and see why history will miss this one.

Click here (YouTube)

Vote On The New Title!

2009-10-07T11:38:00.002-04:00

Oh, yes, it's that time again -- Fall approaches, pumpkins appear, and my wife revels in the fact that I'm physically incapable of picking my own title for the next book. In my defense, this is a different kind of title, since it's the first non-fiction book I've ever done.

So first, please help us vote (pick one of these titles only -- and the description of the book is below, but don't read that until you vote). Which title do you like better:

Heroes For My Son

or

50 Heroes For My Son

Yes, I know they're similar. Just vote (you can vote below, or send an email to bradmeltzer44 at gmail.com, or at @bradmeltzer on twitter). You vote? Okay, then here's what the book's about:

Since the day my son was born, I've been writing a book for him. It's a collection of heroes throughout history. Some are famous (like Jim Henson, Mr. Rogers, and Rosa Parks). Some are totally unknown. (In fact, if you have someone you're thinking of, send them my way). But the result is this book -- a gift to my son.

Yes, I know I'm mushy. It's for my boys. I'm allowed. (I'll be even more mushy in the book I did for my daughter, which comes out the following year.)

So there you go. Whatever it's called, it won't be out until May 2010 (yes, for Father's Day), so please vote now. And as always, thanks for putting up with this.

Love,

Indiana Visit!

2009-09-29T13:49:00.002-04:00

I'm coming to Indiana this Saturday (October 3rd, 7:30 pm) for a reading, signing, talk -- all the good stuff at the Michigan City Public Library, 100 E. Fourth Street, Michigan City (Google Map).

Call 219-873-3049 for more information and here's a link to the event.

And as always, will sign whatever you want to bring.

Be In The Next Novel

2009-09-23T10:29:00.002-04:00

Wanna get your name (or a loved one's name) in my next novel and help a good cause?

Comix4Sight Auction

Save This Blog!

2009-09-22T18:34:00.003-04:00

One of my favorite book blogs -- Off The Page -- is in danger of getting the axe, and so it falls to us to prove to the morons who cancel such things that, well...we're reading it.

It's written by Chauncey Mabe and Oline Cogdill, two South Florida folks who have a real love of books and who are vital to the art community here.

So please do click the link and root them on.

Twitter (sigh)

2009-09-15T09:48:00.002-04:00

Yes, I'm finally on Twitter, @bradmeltzer.

Happy now, Dad?

Forget Kanye

2009-09-14T13:33:00.002-04:00

Forget Kayne. Norman Borlaug died. One of my true heroes (and yes, he's in the heroes book i'm doing).

Penn & Teller on Dr. Borlaug

Summer Books And Movies

2009-09-04T13:52:00.002-04:00

Finally back from two weeks away, and just need to recommend one book and one film that're worth checking out.

For the book, it's Stitches by David Small. Yes, I read it months ago, but I think it's so douche-y to talk about a book no one else can buy -- and it's now finally on sale. It was the only book I brought back from BookExpo in May. Yes, it's a comic. And yes, I wish the ending were a hair more self-examining, but man, I promise you will be blown away. Just heartbreaking and wonderful in all the right places.

As for film, for sure, go see the Basterds and District 9, but when you're ready to really get king nerd going (and here comes the douche-y part because you can't buy it yet. God, I'm a hypocrite), go see the independent movie Last Son by fellow Jerry Siegel obsessed Brad Ricca. It'sf packed with never before seen footage/images/facts about Jerry Siegel and Joe Shuster and the creation of Superman. And to totally steal from him: There is just "an Earth-2 (and 3) level of cool that two Brads were at different times in the same library having these big OMG moments in seeing this stuff. And (ready for this?) In the EXACT SAME ROOM where Joanne Siegel spread out her mail from her newspaper ad and chose Joe's to answer."

How's that for a benefit? Watch this film and see proof that another Earth exists.

That's the summer catch-up. Novel is coming along. First Buffy script is in. Art is just starting to show up. And big news coming about the non-fiction book, which is now coming out in May.

Senator Ted Kennedy

2009-08-26T10:37:00.000-04:00

At 19, I was an intern in the Senate. I got to see and meet tons of senators who couldn't care less about interns. But one day, just as the elevator doors were closing, Senator Ted Kennedy stepped inside. I wasn't a Kennedy groupie. I was 19--I didn't care about Senators. But I still remember looking up and seeing, for the first time in my life, someone who was -truly- bigger than life. I just stood and stared.

Help Fight Cancer and Get Something for Yourself

2009-08-21T22:11:00.001-04:00

I know you're tired of doing good deeds for no reason -- you ask yourself, "What's in it for me?" Well, for once, here is something for you (especially if you know a child who likes Ninja Turtles).

To offset expenses for my pal Jake Black's cancer treatment, Mirage--the Ninja Turtles Company--has released a t-shirt. You pick the size. You pick the color. And Jake gets some help.

And you look cool. And you sleep the good sleep.

Check it out. And thanks for checking it out.

Back on Topps

2009-07-21T17:42:00.002-04:00

They're my friends so I plug for them. But this is good stuff. So here it is, season 2 of the Emmy-nominated original online series, Back on Topps starring The Sklar Brothers.

Back on Topps

Thrillerfest and Superman

2009-07-14T10:42:00.002-04:00

Just now getting back from the weekend, which was wild for sheer surrealness, starting with the visit to the house where Superman was created. Last time I was there, the paint was peeling, the roof was dumping water into the bedrooms, the whole place was a mess. Today, the outside is pristine. It's the Norman Rockwell painting I imagined in my head. And of course, we took an early sneak peek at the Superman fence that now marks the spot (now that the house is no longer red and blue, it needed something). And for the ultra geeks, it's the original S. Go see it here (WSJ)...click slideshow...

Had a beautiful time catching up with all the Siegel & Shuster Society members, who are the dearest people around. And then, it was onto the roomful of real Siegels and Shusters. I mean, it. All of them. A hundred or so relatives, each with their own personal story of Joe drawing on butcher's paper, and Jerry telling stories. Natch, the pinnacle was meeting the real Lois Lane, Joanne Siegel, who was...how does this not sound odd...stunning. Really stunning. And so full of life. Like you look at her and know that she should've inspired the most famous reporter. Her daughter and the rest of their family are so appreciative of all of your work and I bring back love and hugs and mushy stuff for all.

Then onto Thrillerfest, where I got to spend time with pals (dicky name-drop time) Harlan Coben, David Baldacci, Sandra Brown, Steve Berry, Jon Land, and loads of others that I rarely get to see but always love seeing. The Thriller writers get it so right. A full conference just to discuss (and help other writers with) the craft.

And then back home, where my son says to me, "I hate to read." Perfect ending to a weekend of literacy love. We're now (and me we, I mean Jason Sherry, who did the first video, and the film CUBES) putting together a new video so you can see the new house for yourself. I can't thank you enough for putting the word out and telling people and doing what each of you individually did. As I said over and over, it wasn't me. YOU were the reason it really got done.

This week is going to the Heroes for my Son book.

Free Book

2009-07-10T16:03:00.002-04:00

As I sit on a plane, headed to Cleveland, here's a little Friday love: a free copy of The First Counsel. Really. Free. You can read the whole thing through this new program is trying out (read: experimenting and praying with).

Superman, Buffy and Freemasons

2009-07-07T10:20:00.002-04:00

Off to Cleveland later this week for the final unveiling of the newly restored house where Superman was created. Let me be clear: it is only restored because of you. All the people who passed the news around...who talked it up...who forwarded the video. All the writers and artists who donated stuff. All the Siegel & Shuster Society people who did the true heavy lifting. And all the members of the Invisible Army, who are sneaky and amazing. Love you like family. If I were Oprah, I'd buy you all hovercars.

The ribbon cutting (which I have to miss because of a previous promise to Thrillerfest) is Saturday at 10am at the house, so please do come if you're near Cleveland. Address is 10622 Kimberly Avenue. For me, the real thrill will be Friday night, when we sit down for dinner with the Siegel and Shuster families. Will of course bring back a full report.

Also, the Buffy writing is underway. That is all.

Also also, the fourth geocache has been hidden (for the promotion we're doing with the Freemasons). The clue is here.

It's Happening

2009-06-23T10:16:00.001-04:00

I need to point this out. This is the gold mine from The Zero Game. This is exactly what I said they'd do with it. This is exactly what they're doing. They see you right now. They told me. They see you shaking your head. They see it all.

Work begins on world's deepest underground lab AP
By DIRK LAMMERS, Associated Press Writer

SIOUX FALLS, S.D. – Far below the Black Hills of South Dakota, crews are building the world's deepest underground science lab at a depth equivalent to more than six Empire State buildings — a place uniquely suited to scientists' quest for mysterious particles known as dark matter.

Scientists, politicians and other officials gathered Monday for a groundbreaking of sorts at a lab 4,850 foot below the surface of an old gold mine that was once the site of Nobel Prize-winning physics research.

The site is ideal for experiments because its location is largely shielded from cosmic rays that could interfere with efforts to prove the existence of dark matter, which is thought to make up nearly a quarter of the mass of the universe.

The deepest reaches of the mine plunge to 8,000 feet below the surface. Some early geology and hydrology experiments are already under way at 4,850 feet. Researchers also hope to build two deeper labs that are still awaiting funding from Congress.

"The fact that we're going to be in the Davis Cavern just tickles us pink," said Tom Shutt of Case Western Reserve University in Cleveland, referring to a portion of the mine named after scientist Ray Davis Jr., who used it in the 1960s to demonstrate the existence of particles called solar neutrinos.

Davis and a colleague named John Bahcall won a share of the 2002 Nobel Prize for physics for their work.

The old Homestake Gold Mine in a community called Lead (pronounced LEED) was shut down in 2001 after 125 years. Pumps that kept the mine dry were turned off years ago, so workers have been drying it out to prepare for the new research.

Before the labs are built, crews must also stabilize the tunnels and install new infrastructure. The lab at 4,850 feet is not much to look at yet. A rusty orange film covers the walls, floors, ceilings and debris left behind by miners.

The first dark matter experiment will be the Large Underground Xenon detector experiment — or LUX — a project to detect weakly interacting particles that could give scientists greater insight into the Big Bang explosion believed to have formed the universe.

Shutt, along with Brown University's Rick Gaitskell and nearly a dozen collaborators will work at the site to search for dark matter, which does not emit detectable light or radiation. But scientists say its presence can be inferred from gravitational effects on visible matter.

Scientists believe most of the dark matter in the universe contains no atoms and does not interact with ordinary matter through electromagnetic forces. They are trying to discover exactly what it is, how much exists and what effect it may have on the future of the universe.

Physicists have said that without dark matter, galaxies might never have formed. By learning more about dark matter, they hope to understand better whether the universe is expanding or contracting.

The research team will try to catch the ghostly particles in a 300-kilogram tank of liquid xenon, a cold substance that is three times heavier than water. If they tried to detect dark matter above ground, the highly sensitive detector would be bombarded by cosmic radiation.

Scientists hope to start construction on the two deepest labs by 2012 and open them by 2016. The projects are expected to cost $550 million.

Brad's Graduation Speech

2009-06-19T10:33:00.006-04:00

Last night, we went to the graduation ceremony for City Year Miami. When Brad got up to speak, he told the graduates that when he was 22 years old and graduating from the University of Michigan, he entered the schoolwide competition to be the graduation speaker. He lost, never even making the second round. But as he said last night, he's a stubborn bastard. He is. And then he reached into his pocket and pulled out the speech that he'd waited nearly 20 years to give. See below. Back then, the term Gen-X wasn't even invented, but his words are as relevant now as they were then (and does it sound like him, or what?). Just some fun to remind us when we were young.

Feel free to send to others, of course...

- Cori

Chase Your Dreams; Find Your Road Runner
By Brad Meltzer, age 22

The media loves to speculate about what our generation will accomplish. They call us the "Television Generation" or "The Baby-busters." Above all else, the media loves to report that our generation, aged 18-25, will be the first generation in history to have less than our parents. I cannot express how much this annoying little factoid bothers me.

I do not question the economic principles on which this prediction is based; rather, I am concerned about the consequences of the statement. It is both silly and bothersome to hear anyone "tell" us what we will be. The logical flaws alone are staggering. How can they know what our generation will accomplish when so many of our future leaders are still sitting here, awaiting graduation? It is as if they are trying to write that widely read year-in-review article before the year takes place.

They don't know our capabilities or the extent of our ingenuity. They simply base their "prediction" on the assumption that our limits are equal to the limits of their generation. They are wrong. This is a new generation. Graduates, it is "our" generation, and we differ from all others. Granted, we may have lower national math scores, and lower geographical knowledge. Certainly, there is some truth to the notion that we will not have the same economic advantages that our parents had. Yet, that does not mean that we will necessarily have less than our parents. Let the world know - we will not be counted out. I am confident we will surprise them. We have a different type of knowledge; more street-smart and clever. We are imaginative and more ingenious.

Creativity is an elemental force of nature. Use that force in whatever you decide to do. Whether you choose law, medicine, business, teaching, or any of the other limitless doors that are open to you, show the world - our time has come - we have arrived, and we will not be easily defeated.

As we face graduation, do not be scared of the future. Embrace it. Do not weather the storm. Control it. Make the most of your time, and we will make the best of our generation.

For the past two decades, we have seen Wile E. Coyote chase the ever-elusive Road Runner. For twenty years, we have known that he will never be able to catch him; yet, we still continue to watch. No matter how impossible our dreams might be, we must all practice the childhood lessons of Wile E. Coyote. Be persistent as you chase your own dreams, so that you may one day find your Road Runner.

Thank you, and good luck to you all. Go Blue.

New Secret Treasure!

2009-06-09T10:08:00.002-04:00

Alright partypeople, the new secret treasures are now hidden (parts 2 and 3) in the team-up we're doing with the Freemasons. If you're saying, "What the hell is he talking about?" go read this to hear more about how you can GPS to find the geocaches that are hidden in the DC/MD/VA area.

As before, each clue overlaps thematically with The Book of Lies. And they're really getting cooler and cooler. Solve the puzzle...get the coordinates...find the goodies. One of them can only be seen at night. Pretty sneaky, sis.

So here you go -- and thanks to Johnny_Cache and Sue Hislop, our masterminds.

Book of Lies: Part 1, Scene 2, Alligator Alley

Book of Lies: Part 1, Scene 3, The Canal

Old Jews Telling Jokes

2009-06-06T07:41:00.000-04:00

I am now going to do you a favor. I used to hate Father's Day. It was a fake holiday. Until I got presents on it. So take this link, send it to your Dad, and wish him a Happy Father's Day with it. He deserves it.

Thanks to Jason S. for finding it.

Old Jews Telling Jokes

New Cover

2009-06-04T09:36:00.003-04:00

Here's the newest foreign cover -- this one for the paperback in the UK and Australia and published by the always classy Hodder & Stoughton (my first editor there was named George Lucas, so he called me on the phone the first day and left the message, "I'm George Lucas and I want to buy your book." Hurm). Clearly, they like the scary little running man over there too.

Hidden Treasure!

2009-06-02T17:53:00.002-04:00

One of the things we're doing to promote the paperback of Book of Lies (see, plug right there!) is a collaboration with the Freemasons. Yes. The Freemasons. I love those guys. And after The Book of Fate, we connected in that Mork/Orson way and they started pointing out all these Freemason things that had been running through my books without me knowing it. Was wild.

And so, we're launching a geocaching puzzle.

Geocaching is a high-tech treasure hunt played throughout the world by people armed with GPS devices. The basic idea is to solve puzzles and locate hidden containers, called geocaches, that're hidden all over. You don't need to read the book to do the puzzle. But you do need one of those cool GPS devices (though an iPhone does the trick).

I'm not saying any more, but if you're in (or plan to be in) Washington, DC, Maryland, or Virginia, go to www.bradmeltzer.com (on the homepage) and get ready to find. We hid the stuff, but good.

Beatles

2009-06-02T10:15:00.001-04:00

Watch this. I know. It's a trailer for a new videogame, but...just trust me. It's the Beatles.

Superman House

2009-05-28T10:22:00.002-04:00

The number one email we've gotten over the past few months is: What's happening with the Superman House?

And so, finally, a true update (and you can see more on Newsarama):

As some of you know, our goal was to raise $50,000 to work on the outside of the house. In the end, we raised $101,000. So work is now going on in the inside as well. It's just beautiful.

So let this be my invitation to all: On Saturday, July 11, 2009, in Cleveland, we'll have the official ribbon-cutting and unveiling of the redone Siegel house. The roof, the siding, the cement...so much has been done to this place. They even repainted it back to historic colors (honestly, I kinda liked the red and bright blue), but history won in this one. The only thing that made me crazy was the dark green trim. Green on Superman's house? A bunch of us screamed bloody kryptonite, but again, it's good to have the history. And from what I hear, we'll have a great showing by the Siegel family for the big unveiling. So if you're anywhere near Cleveland, hope you'll join us.

Finally, the one thing people really need to know is how much work the Siegel & Shuster Society put into this. We all helped raise the money, but they did all the heavy lifting. The people of Cleveland did that. We owe them forever for getting it done.

And finally, finally, based on the success of the Siegel house, we've actually turned our attention to a new cause. So now, if people go to www.OrdinaryPeopleChangeTheWorld.com (or on Facebook too), they'll see us raising money for City Year, an organization that my wife and I recently helped bring to Miami -- but is one of the premier service organizations around the world. It's like a Peace Corps for the United States and it empowers kids 17 - 24 years old. All we're asking is for people to give one dollar. Just one. Watch the video. (YouTube link)

So to all: thank you. The government never cared about the Siegel house. Politicians didn't care about it. It was the writing and art community that did this. And it proves to me, once again, why I believe in the heroes I believe in.

My Favorite Video Ever

2009-05-27T09:18:00.002-04:00

In honor of the paperback publication and the new dog cover, here's a new version of my favorite video we ever made (with a new ending). Jason Sherry is a genius.

Everyody still hates Brad Meltzer in paperback. (YouTube link)

Massive Guilt

2009-05-26T11:06:00.002-04:00

I hate telling you this. But if I didn't tell you, then you'd email me and say, "Why didn't you tell me?"

And I'd write, "I didn't wanna bother you."

And you'd write, "Will you please stop with the humble nonsense? We all know you're a narcissist. Besides, you should tell us this stuff."

And then I'd feel all this guilt (even more than the usual guilt I feel).

And then I'd tell you anyway.

So.

Today's the day that The Book of Lies comes out in paperback. Same keen mystery. Same keen ending. Much lower price! And as Facebook friends know, way ultra-keen new cover with foreboding dog image.

So if you'd like to buy it (or just see the cover, or you need a small paper block to balance your couch), click here.

Most important, let me send some true love and appreciation to you and yours. Summer's here and that makes me feel young and spry and ready for a game of red rover (because let's be honest, that's as close to sports as I ever got). So so happy to have you in our lives.

Love and thanks and teddy bears,

Germans!

2009-05-08T10:32:00.001-04:00

Got a new publisher in Germany, who just sent me the scariest coolest cover.
I'm now scared of myself.

Dom DeLuise Dies At 75

2009-05-05T14:57:00.002-04:00

My father and I rarely agree on movies. But easily my favorite Dad movie memory from childhood was watching Cannonball Run with him. More specifically the outtakes at the end. When we'd watch that together -- "these bleeds?" -- all our differences melted away and our humor level was exactly the same. Of course, the key ingredient wasn't Burt Reynolds, or Sammy Davis. It was Dom DeLuise. Every time he laughed...just go watch it.

Cannonball Run Outtakes (YouTube)

I knew I wasn't alone when The State parodied it all those years ago. So a moment of silence for the man who earned those laughs.

Movies

2009-05-04T09:27:00.002-04:00

I feel like I've been on a tear of recommending trailers. So why stop now? Here's my new favorite.

More Than A Game (Apple Trailers)

New Cover, New Song

2009-05-01T12:22:00.004-04:00

Here's the sneak peek of the new cover for the paperback (coming out at the end of the month on May 26th). Trust me, I was surprised as you were at the image. I do like it. Skeevy. And I guess they wanted to ride the power of the dog, and so we ride...

Also, as some true love from me to you (and in honor of Buy Indie day), here's a nice little video that walks the line of schmaltz but still makes me do the smile:

Calculator!

2009-04-23T15:02:00.003-04:00

If you're missing it -- and especially for those with kids -- the most fun happening in cartoons right now is Batman's Brave and the Bold on Cartoon Network. I love this show. It's somehow, oddly, impossibly satisfying for us adults, while being (gasp!) fun for the kiddos.

And the fact they're doing Calculator? (Newsarama) Oh me oh my. I don't even care if it's the original costume. That may be the best part. (See? Fun!) And if they call him Noah Kuttler, I will die. Right there. I will die and the real Noah will die too. It'll be amazing.

PS - In the video, his name is Myron. We live till the sequel.

Facing Ali

2009-04-22T10:19:00.001-04:00

This is how you make a trailer (Apple.Com/Trailers). Can't wait.

To Start Your Day

2009-04-14T10:27:00.002-04:00

I know Les Miz is so durn overrated.

I know this is just a promo for a TV show.

I know they're manipulating us with editing and music.

And I know their Paula is better than our Paula.

But boy, do I love this (YouTube).

I wish it for everyone.

Love and teddy bears to all.

1950s Us

2009-04-13T10:59:00.002-04:00

Just a great article about movies and our past (and our future) [NY Times]. The opening sentence alone is worth it: “The past is a foreign country,” the novelist L. P. Hartley once wrote; “they do things differently there.”

Thanks to Scott Butki at Newsvine for the heads up.

Eisners

2009-04-07T22:22:00.001-04:00

Just saw the Eisner nominations for this year. Especially excited by the love for Matt Wagner (one of my first pals in comics), and for Matt Fraction (who I don't know (tried to find him at the Eisners last year), but is easily one of my current favorites). Go read his X-Men annual. I haven't bought an X-Men annual since it was in a polybag. Easily one of the best stories of the year.

Birthday Love

2009-04-03T23:14:00.001-04:00

Just a quick thanks for all the birthday love this week. Was a good week here -- working on the new novel, off to Kansas, back already. And lots of time to read what everyone wrote.

It matters. It does. Even at my most cynical, it matters.

So thank you.

Hugs and teddy bears.

Spike & Eggers

2009-03-26T14:48:00.001-04:00

Okay, I take back everything from yesterday's blog. Instead, I replace it with today's. "WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE TRAILER (!!!)" (FilmDrunk). See the screenwriters too.

Three Stooges coming soon

2009-03-25T15:07:00.001-04:00

I can't possibly explain why this (Variety) gets me excited.

MGM gets its 'Stooges'
Penn, Carrey, Del Toro part of studio's plan
By MICHAEL FLEMING

MGM and the Farrelly brothers are closing in on their cast for "The Three Stooges."

Studio has set Sean Penn to play Larry, and negotiations are underway with Jim Carrey to play Curly, with the actor already making plans to gain 40 pounds to approximate the physical dimensions of Jerome "Curly" Howard.

The studio is zeroing in on Benicio Del Toro to play Moe.

The film is not a biopic, but rather a comedy built around the antics of the three characters that Moe Howard, Larry Fine and Howard played in the Columbia Pictures shorts.

The quest by the Peter and Bobby Farrelly to harness the project spans more than a decade and three studios. They first tried at Columbia, again at Warner Bros., and finally at MGM, where Worldwide Motion Picture Group chairman Mary Parent championed the cause and bought the WB-owned scripts and made a deal with Stooges rights holders C3.

Production will begin in early fall for a release sometime in 2010. The Farrellys, who wrote the script, are producing with their Conundrum partner Bradley Thomas, and Charlie Wessler.

C3 Entertainment principals Earl and Robert Benjamin will be executive producers.

Project will get underway after Penn completes the Asger Leth-directed Universal/Imagine Entertainment drama "Cartel." He hasn't done a comedy since the 1989 laffer "We're No Angels."

The Farrellys have long had their eyes on Del Toro to play Moe. Del Toro, who's coming off "Che," showed comic chops in the Guy Ritchie-directed "Snatch."

The surprise is the emergence of Carrey to play Curly. Howard established the character as a seminal physical comedian, from the first time he appeared in the first Stooges short in 1934 until he suffered a stroke on the set in 1946.

Weekend in Pop Culture

2009-03-23T10:34:00.001-04:00

Just back from a beautiful weekend in Charlottesville, so thanks to all who came to the Virginia Festival of the Book and introduced themselves. Was one of my favorite events in a long while.

On the plane, was submerged in pop culture, which really just seemed to be peeking since I was eating it all at once:

The end of Battlestar Galactica - Loved and felt totally satisfied (even ignoring my minor geek tweaks), and made me wish more shows ended before they overstay.
My MacBook (yes, made the switch 10 months ago), but this was the first time I felt it, when, in the airport, I realized I'd only downloaded half the Battlestar ending on iTunes and had to get the final half before I boarded the plane. Love the internets.
Favorite new show to replace Battlestar: Friday Night Lights. Football, jocks, remake of a movie -- all of these things kept me away from the show, but (and I'm halfway through season 1, so don't ruin it), this is clearly the best written show on TV for me. I love it. I love it. It shouldn't work, but it all does. Amazing that I love this like I love The Wire. (I said it).
Wrote the intro for Absolute Promethia (such goodness)
And just digging the hell out of Kings, by my pal Michael Green. Go support him!

Disney and Elmo

2009-03-19T09:55:00.002-04:00

Just back from a week's vacation in Disney, where the clear high point was the stop in Sea World. Why? Because when I was 15 years old, I spent all my free time (and four years of high school) scooping ice cream at the Häagen-Dazs in the Aventura Mall. It taught me to hate rich people and to be nice to anyone serving food of any kind (except for those Orange Julius pricks). But the highlight was my best pal at work, a fellow 15 year old who always said his lifelong dream was to train the whales and dolphins at Sea World. He even wore a cheesy gold whale tail around his neck (don't make fun, I used to wear a Superman charm. It was a gift, Snoopy).

Twenty years later, he's at Sea World. The star of the whale and dolphin show. I cry every time I see him.

So go be nice to the ice cream guys. Tip 'em too. If you're a jerk, we used our pinkies to break the bottom of your cone so it'd leak on you by the time you hit JC Penney. Eat that.

Also, here's Ricky Gervais and Elmo.

Saint Dave

2009-03-09T10:03:00.001-04:00

Of all the Watchmen news over the weekend, I think I've been most impressed by all-around amazing guy Dave Gibbons. In addition to being said nice guy and all, he has really stepped as an ambassador to comics. Every interview he does he keeps bringing it back to the comic (instead of just focusing on the movie).

Take a look at it here (Time Magazine).

As polite as he has been about the whole thing, I'm so happy that he said out loud what we all know -- and that's that a movie is not the highest aspiration a comic (or novel) can achieve. A book is a book. If it's a movie, great. But aspire to what's really important.

Bigger Than Watchmen

2009-03-06T12:24:00.001-05:00

Here's the true biggest story in comics today. And it'll have far more of a lasting impact on the industry than any new movie: The New York Times Graphic Novel Bestseller List.

Brad Saw Watchmen

2009-03-03T10:08:00.001-05:00

Saw Watchmen last night. You have to go see it and decide for yourself. You have to. Don't read reviews. Don't be influenced. Make your own decision (just like when the comic came out).

But let me just say this -- seeing the film is like seeing, twenty years later, the girl/boy from junior high that you had your biggest crush on. It's thrilling. And gets your blood flying -- really flying. But what stands out most is what's different and imperfect and therefore (unfairly or fairly) outstandingly wrong.

What they get perfect is so damn perfect (it's insane how perfect). What they get wrong feels like lemons on your papercuts. But go see. You'll know.

Brad Seeing Watchmen Tonight

2009-03-02T15:50:00.001-05:00

Going to see Watchmen tonight. Cone of silence has been on for nearly a year now: no previews, no stills (except for the street scene I saw in Wizard), no casting (except for Kelly from Bad News Bears), no moving images. Caught one tiny look at the Entertainment Weekly Nite Owl cover, but that's IT. And it's taken work. Like avoiding sunlight. So for good or bad, my eyes will be drinking deep tonight. Full report tomorrow.

Also, my pal Bryan Gruley's Starvation Lake launches tomorrow and every new author needs your help, so please do give a look. Got a great review here.

Book Club

2009-02-25T10:40:00.002-05:00

Book Club last night was so damn much fun. It came on the heels of a letter from DC Comics saying that they've sold over a million -- one million -- copies of Watchmen since the trailer was released. Brilliant. So to sit there and watch my wife's overeducated book club argue over utilitarianism vs. retributivism (Adrian vs. Rorschach) was just beautiful. They didn't even complain about the giant squid. Best part was certainly picking apart Chapter V and all the symmetry references -- and the moment when they realized that the little kid reading Black Freighter (and seeing it's reflection in his real world) was a meta-signal of why it's important that we're reading Watchmen and seeing the reflection in our world. Heads exploded. Dr. Manhattan was right. Nothing ever ends.

And super best part? They picked my pal Junot Diaz's Oscar Wao for their next book (and actually think it was their idea).

The revolution is on.

Why I Married My Wife

2009-02-24T09:43:00.003-05:00

Tonight is the night: when all of my wife's friends come over to our house to have their bookclub and discuss Watchmen. I can't tell you how excited I am. For the past two weeks, I've been watching my wife sit in bed, with Watchmen in her lap. I freeze this image in my mind as it brings me the perfect nerd-gasm. My wife. Reading my favorite book. Is that hot or what?

But what's truly hot is this (spolilers ahead): after I mentioned that a few friends who had seen the movie reported back that we'd love what they get right and kill them for what they get wrong, we started compiling a list of all the things that they CAN'T get wrong. The Watchmen untouchables. And in the midst of this frenzy with my pal Jason, my wife said simply to me:

The only thing that has to happen is Rorschach dies.

blink, blink.

"Marry me!" I screamed again.

In conclusion, I've prepared for tonight's book club. I've prepared better for this than most (okay, all) of my law school classes. I've got a list of great themes, from the ultra-obvious (deconstruction of the superhero), to the dangers of nostalgia and longing for the past, to the value of identity, to the discussion of the triangle with Laurie ultimately choosing Dan (Man beats Superman).

But I want more.

So send them in now. Best concepts and ideas and themes and cool things in Watchmen (and don't tell me that issue five runs backwards in perfect symmetry (scoop of chocolate, scoop of vanilla -- don't waste my time)).

The End is Nigh.

UK Pub Date And Watchmen Reaction

2009-02-18T10:17:00.003-05:00

For all those (hi, Cliff!) who wrote and asked when The Book of Lies would be published in the UK, well here you go.

Today's the day -- England, Ireland, Australia and loads of other countries that carry English language books. And we didn't even change all the elevator references to lifts (I used that joke in 1997).

Here's the cover, which I'm fascinated by. Love seeing how other countries interpret it.

Also, after talking to a select few who have seen the movie early, let me pass on the one comment in common: we'll love what they do right. We'll kill people for what they get wrong. That is all.

PS - Also saw a sneak peek of the Zatanna costume for Smallville. Best. Best.

After Watchmen

2009-02-18T10:14:00.001-05:00

First and foremost, my wife just finished reading Watchmen. Was miraculous to sit and talk to her about what is...um...what's been arguably the most important book in my life. I could literally talk for hours on it, and even though I usually know to keep it in check, my inner 15 year-old kept leaping out with geek-glee (trandemark!). The amazing part was how much she loved the book -- got the depth and nuances and all the goodies -- but really didn't like the kill-all-NY ending. In post-9/11, it's just not what we read in 1985. And totally fair point by her. (See more on this in tomorrow's blog about what I heard from people who saw the movie).

Second, see below for DC's new "After Watchmen...What's Next" program. Brilliant. Really. And yes, I know everyone tends to put out more books when the Spider-Man or Batman films hit, but this is different (and not just because we're a part of this one). In truth, I thought this was genius and only after, did I realize we were in it. Watchmen isn't just a movie right now. It's a publishing phenomenon. And I know John Cunningham and the DC crew were the key reason for that. They saw the wave and were ahead of it with this one. So for all those people who ask, what should I read next, see below (or better yet, buy them something YOU love (Y, Ex Machina, Scott Pilgrim, etc).

http://www.newsarama.com/comics/020918-Watchmen.html

DC COMICS ANNOUNCES “AFTER WATCHMEN, WHAT’S NEXT?” PROGRAM

The excitement surrounding the upcoming WATCHMEN feature film has brought new readers to the graphic novel format. Now that they’ve read WATCHMEN, where do they go next? Help point them in the right direction with DC Comics’ “AFTER WATCHMEN, WHAT’S NEXT?” program.

DC Comics has developed a marketing campaign that spotlights several award-winning, best-selling titles from our various imprints. Each book reflects an aspect of WATCHMEN’s broad appeal — including other works by Alan Moore, science fiction tales, post-modern super hero action and sophisticated titles for mature readers — and is a great entry point for both new fans just discovering graphic novels and established readers looking to try something new.

The program is supported by an extensive marketing campaign including five promotionally-priced reprint Specials which are rush solicited below.

The marketing campaign includes:

Five “AFTER WATCHMEN, WHAT’S NEXT?” Specials featuring a cover price of just $1.00:

• SAGA OF THE SWAMP THING #21 SPECIAL EDITION
• TRANSMETROPOLITAN #1 SPECIAL EDITION
• PLANETARY #1 SPECIAL EDITION
• PREACHER #1 SPECIAL
• IDENTITY CRISIS #1 SPECIAL

Please see below for more information on these Specials.

Print:

32-page booklet to be given away at conventions, comics shops and book stores
House ads in the DC Universe, Vertigo and WildStorm titles
Editorial page promotions in Vertigo: On the Ledge, DC Nation and WildStorm Stormfront columns
Trade ads

Online:

E-mail Blasts
National Consumer Online Banner Advertising Campaign
Retailer Tools on DC Comics retailer page on diamondcomics.com
Checklist, Header Card, Shelf Talker and Bag Slick
Bag Stuffer for DC Retailer page for Direct Market retailers

Social Networking:

AFTER WATCHMEN, WHAT’S NEXT? MySpace Group
AFTER WATCHMEN, WHAT’S NEXT? Facebook Group

Conventions:

Ad pages in Convention Program Guides
32-page Booklet distribution at DC booth
Bookmark distribution at DC booth

DCCOMICS.COM:

Website at www.readwatchmen.com
Showcase titles on the homepages of DC, WildStorm and Vertigo throughout February, March and April to capture new WATCHMEN readers
Articles on DC, Vertigo and WildStorm homepages

Co-op:

Co-op Movie Slide
Co-op Ad Slick

**********

DC COMICS RUSH SOLICITS FIVE “AFTER WATCHMEN, WHAT’S NEXT?” SPECIALS

Tying into the new “After Watchmen, What’s Next?” program, DC rush solicits five key titles priced at just $1.00 each!

These titles will arrive in stores weekly beginning March 11, and prominently feature the “After Watchmen, What’s Next?” branding and trade dress. Each is offered to all Diamond retailers at a special “C” discount code of 60% off.

Retailers may order these issues by contacting their Diamond Customer Service Representative or DC Sales Representative, or by email at reorders@diamondcomics.com.

The “AFTER WATCHMEN, WHAT’S NEXT?” Specials are:

SAGA OF THE SWAMP THING #21 SPECIAL EDITION (JAN098009)

Written by Alan Moore

Art by Stephen Bissette & John Totleben

Cover by Tom Yeates

On sale March 11; 32 pg, FC, $1.00 US • MATURE READERS

Final Order Cutoff date: February 19

TRANSMETROPOLITAN #1 SPECIAL EDITION (JAN098010)

Written by Warren Ellis

Art by Darick Robertson & Jerome K. Moore

Cover by Geof Darrow

On sale March 18; 32 pg, FC, $1.00 US • MATURE READERS

Final Order Cutoff date: February 26

PLANETARY #1 SPECIAL EDITION (JAN098011)

Written by Warren Ellis

Art and cover by John Cassaday

On sale March 25; 32 pg, FC, $1.00 US

Final Order Cutoff date: March 5

PREACHER #1 SPECIAL EDITION (JAN098012)

Written by Garth Ennis

Art by Steve Dillon

Cover by Glenn Fabry

On sale April 1; 48 pg, FC, $1.00 US • MATURE READERS

Final Order Cutoff date: March 12

IDENTITY CRISIS #1 SPECIAL EDITION (JAN098013)

Written by Brad Meltzer

Art by Rags Morales & Michael Bair

Cover by Michael Turner

On sale April 8; 48 pg, FC, $1.00 US

Final Order Cutoff date: March 19

Scarlett Johansson's New Role

2009-02-16T13:53:00.000-05:00

Don’t care if it's not true. Don't care if it never happens. In my fantasies, it's now permanent.

Johansson Tipped To Take Black Widow Part (IMDB)
16 February 2009 4:15 AM, PST

British actress Emily Blunt is set to miss out on a coveted role in the forthcoming Iron Man sequel - Scarlett Johansson is reportedly in talks to play femme-fatale the Black Widow.

Blunt was widely tipped to take on the part of Russian spy Natasha Romanoff in the follow-up of the 2008 blockbuster.

But The Devil Wears Prada star faces a scheduling conflict, after signing up to act alongside funnyman Jack Black in a new movie version of Gulliver's Travels.

And Johansson is now close to agreeing a deal to step into the breach on the forthcoming Iron Man sequel, according to Entertainment Weekly.

Cause Yourself Blindness!

2009-02-13T15:43:00.001-05:00

Just got the below sent to me by the publisher: The Book of Lies is now available for your iPhone. Must admit, haven't tried it yet, since I'm waiting for a new Blackberry (still can't believe with all the stuff we get sent, no one has a connection for me at RIM), so have no idea how the reading experience is. But a free book of your choice to the first person who tries it out and actually reads. As usual, email me through the site and I'll send goodies. If you get no goodies, you weren't first. Or I think you cheated.

Book of Lies For Your iPhone

Have a great weekend all. And to all those with no Valentine (curse it for being on a Saturday night), be mine. My wife says it's cool as long as it's impersonal and internety.

Candy From Youth And A Thank You

2009-02-11T16:10:00.001-05:00

First, a huge thank you to everyone who has responded to this and sent in their personal stories about their parents. What amazed me isn't just that people have written -- it's the honestly of what you're writing. I continue to maintain that we have the best readers of any author (suck it, JD Salinger!) -- and it's because there's such a true humble honestly that radiates from you all.

In return (beyond trying to do justice with some of the stories), I share these candy-bar commercials, which I found while looking for info on Chunky candy bars. The $100,000 Bar orgasmic reaction is particularly fantastic (plus, corded phones!). Enjoy.

Lego

2009-02-04T13:03:00.003-05:00

For any conversation about how awesome Legos are. This is the awesome.

I LEGO N.Y. (New York Times)

And this is the spaceship Lego I was OBSESSED with when younger. By the end, I could build it by heart.

Violinist

2009-02-04T13:00:00.003-05:00

Kinda hate the Washington Post for doing this (sinply because they can be exactly the kinds of snobs who’d walk right past this guy). But also gotta love them for doing this.

A Violinist in the Metro (Washington Post)

A man sat at a metro station in Washington DC and started to play the violin; it was a cold January morning. He played six Bach pieces for about 45 minutes.

During that time, since it was rush hour, it was calculated that thousand of people went through the station, most of them on their way to work. Three minutes went by and a middle aged man noticed there was musician playing. He slowed his pace and stopped for a few seconds and then hurried up to meet his schedule. A minute later, the violinist received his first dollar tip: a woman threw the money in the till and without stopping continued to walk. A few minutes later, someone leaned against the wall to listen to him, but the man looked at his watch and started to walk again. Clearly he was late for work. The one who paid the most attention was a 3 year old boy. His mother tagged him along, hurried but the kid stopped to look at the violinist. Finally the mother pushed hard and the child continued to walk turning his head all the time. This action was repeated by several other children. All the parents, without exception, forced them to move on. In the 45 minutes the musician played, only 6 people stopped and stayed for a while. About 20 gave him money but continued to walk their normal pace He collected $32. When he finished playing and silence took over, no one noticed it. No one applauded, nor was there any recognition. No one knew this but the violinist was Joshua Bell, one of the best musicians in the world. He played one of the most intricate pieces ever written with a violin worth 3.5 million dollars. Two days before his playing in the subway, Joshua Bell sold out at a theater in Boston and the seats average $100. This is a real story. Joshua Bell playing incognito in the metro station was organized by the Washington Post as part of a social experiment about perception, taste and priorities of people. The outlines were: in a commonplace environment at an inappropriate hour: Do we perceive beauty? Do we stop to appreciate it? Do we recognize the talent in an unexpected context?

Be in the New Novel

2009-02-03T10:29:00.001-05:00

Yes, it’s that treasured time again: when I offer to cast your life in a book, in the hopes that you’ll share something private, real, and most important, honest about your personal life for the benefit of this imaginary character I’m working on. In the past, some of the best details for characters have come from friends and readers, so before we go forward, let’s go through the usual disclaimer: if you reply to this (whether you post or send me a private message), I actually may use it in a book, so you waive your rights to sue me, hate me, or give me Indian burns. In fact, at least three readers/friends from this blog were in the last book (see the Acknowledgments, though a few more asked their names withheld).

Now onto the personal question:

Are you (or have you ever known) someone who grew up with an absent parent -- or more specifically -- without knowing who one of your parents was? (could be by death, abandonment, divorce or because they left or you never knew who they were) If so, how did it affect your life? (And I mean that specifically. Not just, “It made me insecure, or strong, or whatever.” HoW did that insecurity or strength actually manifest?) As always, personal examples (incidents/dreams/fears/stories) are always best. And if you want to send something private, please send to bradmeltzer27 [AT] gmail [dot] com. And again, thanks for the honesty -- that’s easily the most vital and appreciated part.

Ghost Photos

2009-02-02T11:35:00.001-05:00

Thanks to Warren Ellis, who of course should be the one to find these:

War Haunted

Favorite Tour Interview

2009-02-02T11:33:00.001-05:00

This may be my favorite interview from the entire book tour.

Love to KCRW for doing it — it mixes my top 5 songs with 5 points in my life. And you’ll hear how I got a gun pulled on me, and had Blues Traveler play in our kitchen.

Listen (don't just read the transcript) at: http://www.kcrw.com/music/programs/gd/gd090128brad_meltzer

The Onion

2009-01-30T11:00:00.000-05:00

Back from NY and back to the warm weather. Read a great comic script from a young writer who I’ve been rooting for for awhile now. Just reminds me that the new crop is coming through (which is always so damn beautiful — see Hickman and Fraction for my current faves).

And here’s why The Onion is still the webpage that should never be missed.

Obama Disappointed Cabinet Failed To Understand His Reference To 'Savage Sword Of Conan' #24

New York

2009-01-29T09:53:00.000-05:00

In NY for top secret book project. Jump into little sushi place. Look...Bruce Willis. Crash on sister's couch. I miss this place.

Election Comics

2009-01-27T11:13:00.002-05:00

I don’t like to use this place to shill. But when it comes to shilling, there’s nothing like shilling for your friends. And so, in honor of our mutual pal The Calculator aka Noah Kuttler aka the guy who posts all this stuff everyday, let me shill for our mutual pal Dan Goldman and his book about the election, which comes out today.

It’s a graphic novel look into the 08 election (titled “08”. Duh.). I’ve known Dan a long time now, so check out his site at: http://dangoldman.net/08/

Gaiman

2009-01-23T11:18:00.000-05:00

After our talk at the White House, Neil Gaiman just sent me the first half of his upcoming Batman story, “Whatever Happened to the Caped Crusader?”

For the past few months, I’ve been trying to imagine the other puzzle pieces from the few end pieces that he gave me. Usually, nothing lives up to your imagined perfection (see Phantom Menace, et al).

But this one has such an elegant simplicity to it. Rest assured, it’s in the perfect person’s hands.

Also, as my wife finally started reading Watchmen, I sat next to her in bed, reading issue one over her shoulder. And I giggled that evil giggle when she flipped right past that redhead with the End is Nigh sign.

Oscars

2009-01-22T10:33:00.000-05:00

Let me be clear on why I think Hollywood is filled with snobs. One of the best pictures of the year is Wall-E. That’s not an opinion. That’s a fact.

If you ask anyone and they disagree, don’t be friends with them.

Rooting for Slumdog now...

New President

2009-01-20T10:10:00.000-05:00

Forget changing the world and hope and coming together -- this day always reminds me of the publication of The First Council, simply because it came out right as Bush was being sworn in (and as a result, the publisher had thousands of buttons delivered to the freezing crowd, with the tagline: Want to Date the President’s Daughter?).

Was so appropriate back then. Now? Superduper creepy.

Also, easily the most easily overlooked fact of the day:

On Monday, Vice President Dick Cheney pulled a muscle in his back, leaving him in a wheelchair for the inauguration.

It’s like when the guy who played Jar Jar got hurt in an accident before the last Star Wars opened. And some guy said, “That was no accident.”

Wife’s Book Club

2009-01-08T11:48:00.001-05:00

My wife’s book club is one of those book clubs that won’t read my books. They won’t say it (okay, they did say it), but it’s true.

But after years, YEARS of trying, they’re reading Watchmen AND Y: The Last Man, next month.

This was so damn hard, and took such subtle chess playing (I’m talking true years), it is clear to me now that nothing less than world domination for the Invisible Army will follow.

The Worst Seats

2009-01-01T13:21:00.003-05:00

The other night, in Florida, I had the fun of going to see the Broadway show Avenue Q with my pal (douche-y namedrop time) Jeff Marx, one of the creators of Avenue Q.

I'd seen it before. I love it like candy. Good candy. Like Chaleston Chew when those were the best.

But there was something about getting to see it with the guy who dreamed it up -- with his parents and family and friends and all of us there. Broadway and the Tony are nice. But at intermission, we were talking about the beauty of having YOUR play come to YOUR theater in YOUR hometown.

And as I mentioned this beauty to Jeff, he turned to the back of the theater, pointed up to crappy seats up in the balcony, and said, "That's where I used to sit when I came here years ago and saw Phantom."

Let me be clear here: most people, when they find success, never want to think of those days when they had the suck seats. But we should never forget those seats. Those are the best seats we'll ever have in our lives.

What you see below is the picture Jeff took -- of his Tony-award winning play -- from his old seats up in the balcony.

I love him for never forgetting. But I love him more for leaving our amazing center-orchestra seats to take in the view from way back.

PS - Other best part? When the 99-year-old lady usher shooed him (and us) out of the theater, threatening that, "The show's over, young man, time for you to get out."

Final Gift

2008-12-31T10:52:00.002-05:00

In many ways, we’re still getting over this year. And while it’s easy to write silly things about how you need to appreciate every day, and sappy, sappy, sappy — well, boy, those Hallmark cards sometimes get it right (especially the ones with the glittery butterflies).

For me, this year will forever be associated with losing Mom. But in her honor, I’m having one final laugh at the little things: like the fact that she thought the cheap fake horrible ponytail hair she bought at the flea market was “better” than the fancy ones rich people pay retail for.

And for those who still haven’t made their charitable decisions, here are four that we love. All are great. None benefit us. But they do all make the world a prettier place. In no order:

City Year

City Year Miami is off and running. So are 19 other cities.

Just watch this and tell me you don’t get it.

Sharsheret

The place that helped my Mom the most with her battle with breast cancer. Links young women with other young women (and young at heart).

Comic Book Legal Defense Fund

Yes, we still love Hero’s Alliance. ALL our t-shirt sales still go there. But CBLDF is fighting the good fight in the courtroom (and picking all the right First Amendment battles as well).

Save the Superman House

Will have an update soon, but wow, wait till you see what you’ve bulit with this one. The chimneys which were collapsing have been replaced with new masonry. And most importantly, the roof has been replaced with a new roof, which should stop the ongoing interior plaster damage. And then going inside...
So here’s a chance to keep it going (and get a great Chip Kidd t-shirt to boot)

Here’s to a healthy and peaceful new year for you. I’ve leaned very hard -- more than you know -- on our friends and readers this year. Some of the best advice I’ve gotten came from here. So thank you for helping with Book of Lies, the Superman house and Last Will & Testament and for always coming to the signings just to say hey. But most of all, as always, thanks for being part of the family.